Speculations on the mindset of the unattached women who view my 40-something male profile  

pashunateatty 59M
13 posts
9/6/2005 9:26 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Speculations on the mindset of the unattached women who view my 40-something male profile

Speculations on the mindset of the unattached women who view my 40-something male profile

INTRO: Curiosity about my unattached female viewers who first see my pic and then check out my profile

Being a thinker, I have tried to get inside the heads of my female viewers. The following are some of my speculations. I have divided my viewers into several categories and speculated about the mindset and motivations of each. Try not to laugh too hard at my naivity, ladies! I'm just having fun here on A-F-F and putting myself out there.

About 40% of the women who check out my profile send me an Email or a Wink. I can't complain about that response rate.

I check out the profiles of those who view me. I want to understand why someone would see my picture, and be interested enough to check out my profile, and then decide NOT to email or wink. That's an indirect rejection.

When I check out the profiles of ladies who have remained silent, I often see women who I would expect to be my type (or expect would want what I have to offer). Sometimes I contact those ladies, but those contacts usually go nowhere.

I'm intrigued by the indirect rejection implied by viewing my profile and remaining silent. It got me thinking, and what follows are some speculations, broken down by type of unattached female viewer.

TYPE 1 - Testing the waters - Cautiously exploring her passionate side in a safe anonymous manner through talking to men on A-F-F, won't meet with men during this phase, and may just be looking to build her confidence in her sexual appeal to men.

She is developing the courage to open up and acknowledge her natural human interest in new passion and intimacy. She probably will Not have the courage to post her picture.

In the beginning of her journey on A-F-F, she is quite reserved. She may flirt, and she may tease, and then she may run away when she hooks a man's interest. She is learning how to interact with men on a different level than her past experience may have taught her. She is thrilled at her apparent power over men.

She may eventually meet a man off of A-F-F, but not until she graduates from the Testing phase. She must first get her sea legs for the journey on the sometimes-rough ocean of open sexuality that is the A-F-F community.

The "Tester" could be intrigued by my profile. She is thinking hard about her journey of openness, and feels that I may be a safe person to be open with, as well as give her a satisfying contact experience. She is right!

But the tester might be intimidated by me, or so she assumes, since she may not feel comfortable with too much deep honest talk at this phase, at least not yet. She might be more comfy with loose superficial sexy chat with men at this point in her journey.

Or she might conclude wrongly that all I'm looking for is "one thing", and since she's not gonna give it up then why waste her time talking with me? She doesn't appreciate that I love chatting and openness, and like to make new friends wherever the connections lead.

Hey, you silent Testers: Try me! I can play the superficial chat game too, honest! And then we can slowly get more open, in a safe manner at a pace you can live with. You might enjoy the experience.

TYPE 2 - Breaking Free - A long relationship may have ended and the lady is not pleased with the amount of passion and intimacy she has experienced through more traditional dating outlets. She longs for intimacy and passion and is impatient with traditional methods of finding like-minded people. She may have started her journey as a Tester on A-F-F.

The choice of men may be too limited within her traditional circle and she does not like the unsatisfying dry runs and dead ends she has experienced. She wants to cut out the middleman of the traditional dating scene with all of its disappointments.

She acknowledges her desire for high passion and longs to feel the intensity of an electric connection.

She wants to open up freely with decent men about their mutual needs, and see where it goes.

She is really not expecting a LTR to arise from an A-F-F contact, but would be open to it.

A lady who is Breaking Free will be intrigued by my profile, because she has already decided to take some risks with safe men. She is ready for new experiences, including meeting people.

If she doesn't contact me, I'm disappointed.

TYPE 3 - Cruising - The lady has been on A-F-F a while, has not developed a LTR, is enjoying the game, and has the occasional close connection through A-F-F.

She is not a particularly active party animal, and does not frequently meet men off of A-F-F. But she enjoys the friendliness and openness of the A-F-Fers, and likes to be reminded that she is attractive to men. Once in a while she will make a special connection with someone.

But she remains the reasonably reserved person that she appears to be to those who know her in real life.

The Cruiser will likely connect with my profile very well. That doesn't mean she will seek out a connection with me, but she will appreciate my approach to things. She will give respectful consideration to an approach by me. She won't dismiss me out of hand.

If she doesn't contact me, I'm disappointed.

TYPE 4 - Pure Physical Thrill Seeker - Playing the field intensively, making up for lost time and soaking up a large number of new sexual experiences. Main goal is to mindlessly fuck a lot with safe men. Refuses to think too much about it all.

On A-F-F, she can arrange anonymous fuck sessions without have to act too slutty around her favorite local haunts. After the encounters, she realizes that the experience was not fulfilling, even if she technically enjoyed it.

She might have convinced herself that she is not interested in deep talk and a mental connection, because she does not want to think too much right now.

Here's something she might not have realized yet: It's Very Hot to be open and intimate about what makes us tick as humans. It's highly passionate and erotic to get into each others' heads. It takes time, but Try it, you just might Like it. We are all here on A-F-F to acknowledge our humanity.

SPECIAL CHALLENGE TO THRILL SEEKERS - You thrill seekers could teach me a thing or two, and I would welcome the lesson. One of my little hangups is that I get Mucho Electricity through one to one chemistry of the mind. I am not particularly attracted to a lady just because she is willing to fuck. I have been in lifestyle settings with such women, and it is not erotic to know that a strange lady would fuck me. I need that mutual mental connection. The highest eroticism comes from wanting each other as people not just as bodies.

Most Thrill Seekers will reject an approach by me. In fact, it's very unusual that I would approach a Thrill Seeker unless I see something more in them.

I've taken some risks and approached a few, and had mixed results.

Here's your challenge, you Thrill Seekers: Prove me wrong in my attitudes about whether you and I could have a good connection and real electricity.

END OF SPECULATIONS - Don't Flame Me Please!

Ecaffiene 54F

9/6/2005 10:18 am

interesting,i`m still trying to figure out which one i am............Maybe i should check your profile first???

hotandhorny107 60F

9/6/2005 10:32 am

Of course I checked out your profile and am interested. Unfortunately you live a very long way from me, so meeting would not be something that is feasible. Of course if you are ever up my way feel free to let me know..

Philosophy_N_Sex 50M/48F

9/6/2005 11:02 am


Good observations! very good post!

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