Converting a Bear?  

panthersdreamer 48M
182 posts
5/16/2006 5:52 pm

Last Read:
5/23/2006 12:05 am

Converting a Bear?

A priest, a Pentecostal preacher and a Rabbi all
served as chaplains to the students of Northern
Michigan University in Marquette.

They would get together two or three times a week
for coffee and to talk shop.

One day, someone made the comment that preaching to
people isn't really all that hard. A real challenge
would be to preach to a bear.

One thing led to another and they decided to do an
experiment They would all go out into the woods,
find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert

Seven days later, they're all together to discuss
the experience.

Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on
crutches, and has various bandages, goes first: "Well," he says, "I
went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I
found him I began to read to him from the Catechism.
Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and
began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my
holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of
God, he became as gentle a lamb.

The bishop is coming out next week to give him first
communion and confirmation."

Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a
wheelchair, with an arm and both legs in casts, and
an IV drip. In his best fire and brimstone oratory
he claimed, " WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don't
sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then
I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD!

But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I
took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We
wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another
u ntil we came to a creek. So I quick DUNKED him and
BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he
became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the

morning praising Jesus."

They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in
a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction
with IV's and monitors running in and out of him. He
was in bad shape.

The rabbi looks up and says, "Looking back on it,
circumcision may not have been the best way to start
things out with my bear".

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