Famous 'Quotes'...  

ohsodelicious 58F
1747 posts
3/2/2006 9:00 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Famous 'Quotes'...

~~ Woody Allen ~~
"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand."

~~Rodney Dangerfield~~(1921-2004; Thanks for
all the laughs)
"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances
for a date on Saturday night."

~~Lynn Lavner ~~
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL."

~~ Camille Paglia ~~
"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."

~~ George Burns ~~
"Sex is one of the nine reasons for incarnation. The other eight are unimportant."

~~ Sharon Stone ~~
"Women might be able to fake orgasms....But, men can fake a whole relationship."

~~ Tiger Woods ~~
"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps."

~~ Jack Nicholson ~~
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."

~~ Barbara Bush ~~
(Former US First Lady, and you didn't think Barbara had a sense of humor)

"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks, or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is."

~~ Robin Williams ~~
"Ah, yes, divorce... from the Latin word meaning
to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet."

~~ Billy Crystal ~~
"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."

~~ Robert De Niro ~~
"According to a new survey, women feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful."

~~ Dustin Hoffman ~~
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So, what's the problem?"

~~ Jerry Seinfeld ~~
"There's very little advice in men's magazines,
because men think, 'I know what I'm doing. Just
show me somebody naked'."

~~ Robin Williams ~~
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."

~~ Joan Rivers ~~
"It's been so long since I've had sex, I've forgotten who ties up whom."

~~ Steve Martin ~~
"Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences money can buy."

~~ Emo Phillips ~~
"You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school
until you get older. Little things like being spanked everyday by a middle-aged woman. Stuff you pay good money for in later life."

~~ Oscar Wilde ~~
"Bigamy is having one wife too many.
Monogamy is the same."

~~ George Burns ~~
"It isn't premarital sex
if you have no intention of getting married."

caressmewell 55F

3/2/2006 9:36 pm

ROFLMAO! These are good!

ohsodelicious 58F
1922 posts
3/3/2006 9:54 am

Caress, Thanks! I found them online...somewhere?
I hear your the 'terror' of the gym...lol

Big grin...OhSo{=}

ohsodelicious 58F
1922 posts
3/3/2006 9:56 am

Daniel{=}Did you come up with that one by yourself


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