today, tomorrow and yesterday  

nohighman22 65M
5 posts
6/24/2006 8:33 am
today, tomorrow and yesterday

Man, I really feel i am going insane and" losing it "', I know I lost it a long time ago. I have been trying to work thur my " break up'" of my marriage to Anita for over two years now. I recenlly decided to start using yahoo personals and contact some people .I put up a profile and wrote some things about myself that I felt were true . I tried to be as honest and real as possible at the time from what I was feeling. I found some interesting women and wanted to contact them. I started talking to some and thought I was ok in doing this. What I came to realize was I don't think I"am ready and I am pissed off about that.I can't seem to get passed alot of stuff that happened , and alot of that is normal I guess.The real deal is I have been trying to forgive myself and forgive her for a long time. The problem with me is that comittment i made to the marriage and to me and her. We stuck it out over alot of things over the years. We both told each other this was it, we were comitted to "us" no mater what! I broke that vowel to God and her. Now i'am praying for the end of time , to hurry on down the line, cause if i have to spend another moment with you, I don't know if i can survive. i'll never forget my promise or forget my vowel, but lord only knows what i could do right now! So i'am praying for the end of time so i can end my time with you!! It was long ago and far away.

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