Jack's curiosity  

nietchze 44M
195 posts
8/22/2005 12:08 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Jack's curiosity

So I was thinking today about these parties, or meet and greets whatever you want to call them, and why I'm kind of hesitant to attend. Part of it is a social phobia of being in a strange place with no one you know and no place to retreat to. But I go to bars and clubs all the time, so it's more than that I think.

The thought has occurred to me that someone would actually want more than to just shake hands, as I've heard is common. I mean this is a sex site. And the idea of telling someone 'No thanks' is always awkward. For us guys anyway's, you women are probably very accustomed to saying no, but us guys just aren't used to saying it . But it's more than that, too.

In the chatrooms we can be a lot of things. Anything we want really. And as in anything in life or imagination usually distorts things. Some of the people I've met I'm sure aren't as wonderful and amazing as I think they are. For any number of reasons. But mostly I think about how other people see me. Fact is I'm not nearly even half as funny, or cute, or any number of compliments I've gotten in the rooms. I'm just not. And no arguing this point with me. I've known me for 32 years. I'm not beating myself up or anything, it's just true.

I guess it comes down to fantasy. Some fantasies are best left that way. Reality rarely does them justice. I remember when I had my threesome. It sure as hell wasn't nearly as much fun as I had imagined, and it sure as fuck wasn't as great as the porn movies make it out to be. To many elbows, to much squirming around trying to get 3 people comfortable. And usually just as soon as you got comfy someone wanted to switch positions. In the end, it wound up being slightly better than regular sex, and mostly because I could check off another box on my sexual to do list. It's not like it was twice as good as 1 on 1 sex. And really I think I miss having the fantasy of how AMAZING it would be to have one.

What if I meet this one girl that I have built up in my head as wonderful, and find out she has really bad acne and poor hygiene? What if I meet one of my friends from the room and he turns out to be a total asshole? How would I disappoint people.

Remember finding out there was no Santa Claus? Or that your favorite athlete was actually a wife beating steroid junkie? How about that toy you HAD TO HAVE when you were a kid, but when you got it it wasn't nearly as fun as the commercial made it out to be? How about coming out of the movie theatre after watching a movie that looked SOOOO good in the promos? The examples are endless, but you get the point.

justsayhi2005 52F

8/22/2005 4:24 pm

welllll, the best way to go about it is to go without expectations and you'll probably have a good time...I've met lots of people from chat at parties who weren't exactly as I imagined but so what?
oh and btw, I'm much more wonderful and amazing in person than you have been imagining LOL

rm_autumngirl61 56F
741 posts
8/23/2005 4:24 pm

Nietchze, it's about the time that I finally read your written blog that you told me, lol.

I can see your point about the party and about who people are. As for the party, I agree w/ justsayhi2005 above. You go to the party just like you go to the bar or club except that you have met people that you have been chatting with lately. I know you would be nervous. Me, too, I mean I can't hear, you know? But after few drinks, you would feel much better, lol. You could see who they really are. Sometimes you don't expect who they are. That's tough, but you can't just change who people are. Just have fun meeting & greeting at the parties. I had been to few parties myself already, and I had blast.

pseudohippie 51F

8/23/2005 6:30 pm

Eh, you can meet anyone from the site without going to a party. I'm with you 100% about the whole post. Too many elbows.

But yeah, get drunk and that'll solve everything.

And there is no doubt in my MIND that Justy is more wonderful and amazing in person...lol...that's cute, Justy.

justsayhi2005 52F

8/24/2005 8:51 am

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