merlion45 51F
549 posts
8/21/2006 4:43 pm

First guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel !"
Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

"How do most men define marriage ?
An expensive way to get laundry done for free."

"Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves.
After marriage, the 'Y' becomes silent."

"Three rings of marriage: The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering."

"I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury."

"Marriage is for women the commonest mode of livelihood, and the total amount of undesired sex endured by women is probably greater in marriage than in prostitution."

"The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once."

"Bachelors know more about women than married men. If they didn't, they be married too."

In California, there's a 6-month waiting period for filing for divorce, but only a 15-day waiting period for buying a handgun. It's nice to know the government is giving us advice on how to work out our problems."

"Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that."

"If you want to read about love and marriage, you've got to buy two separate books."

"I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house."

"Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success."

"It is best for ordinary men to have only one wife !"

"Where there is marriage without love, there will be love without marriage."

"Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest."

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