the essence of aff  

massagekoning 45M
6 posts
2/3/2006 10:32 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

the essence of aff

i've been analising what's going on here for a while now and i have bad news for you..

what strikes me is the awkward balance between the sexes here on AdultFriendFinder, its like 10 males to every female if you look at the registered users per country.

so basicly that would mean that every woman gets about 10 times more messages than a guy would...
on top of that, taking into account that guys also tend to be 'somewhat' more assertive when it comes to getting them selves noticed by the opposite sex you can easily multiply this by 10 and leaving the average female with a 100 messages to read every day, not to mention the amount of winks and such.

this in turn results in the females having to work overtime reading and answering this shitload of messages which ofcourse any sane person will stop doing after some time let alone answering every single one of them, even if it was only to let the sender know that she isn't interested.

this lack of response causes the guys to think they're being ignored or something like that so the natural response is to start sending even more messages out with probably even poorer content resulting only in even more annoyed females refusing to even read messages from guys they don't know. and this is where we get a very uncool spiral effect.

of course the smarter guys will not increase the amount of messages but make sure the quality of their messages improves but smart people are statistically a minority anyway so overall that won't cause much of a difference.

i think what would help a little is that a woman clearly replies to a guy if she is or isn't interested right after receiving a message, even if its a standard message.

not replying at all gives a guy the idea that she is interested still, whether this assumption is wrong or right doesnt matter for now, but it will result in even more messages.

i've heard it before, women complaining about how they get stalked by guys but when i ask if they even bothered to clearly tell that guy off they tell me they actually never did that... errr...

what do you people think?

massagekoning 45M

2/8/2006 6:01 pm

first post!

to answer my own question,
probably best to send compact, honest to the point yet witty and humorful messages except when a profile explicitly tells you to send a more sophisticated message.

(damn, i'm a fast learner!)

rm_The_Succubus 33F

2/9/2006 12:48 am

In the beginning I always answered back if I wasn't interested but at some point it just gets boring. As you said, we, women, receive a LOT of mails every day but it is not something a man should be jealous of. Most of them are crap like "Hi! Let's meet". I tried to eliminate the number of crappy mail by making rules which no one seems to notice. Even though I am not always strict about them (actually, only the age rule I am not always strict about) I make perfectly clear that if they send a simple line as e-mail I won't be answering. But it seems most men go straight to the mail before reading the profile...and that is why women get a lot of mail...If men bothered to read before write everything would be much better.

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