Another Day of Hell  

lovemetouchme5 52F
1534 posts
6/12/2006 2:28 am

Last Read:
8/19/2006 6:12 pm

Another Day of Hell

I've decided to document what's going on with me here, so I'm able to keep track of everything.

Sunday morning, hubby showed up at the house and things again got completely out of hand. My problem is I can't leave HIM alone. He has me so pissed right now, just looking at him triggers me. One thing led to another and we got into it again.

I ended up calling the sheriff's department..I know, it's about time! I went and talked to a woman from the domestic violence shelter, who guided me through the process of filing an exparte (restraining order). I kept thinking that this is all my fault. That if I wasn't so bull headed, he wouldn't have hurt me. The woman from the shelter said that even if I did get in his face, he still had NO RIGHT to lay his hands on me. Unfortunately, that still doesn't make me feel any better, or less guilty. I never wanted things to go this far.

This morning at 9 am, I am to go to court and ask the judge to grant it. It will only be temporary until he goes to court in 10 days to face his charges. In Missouri, Domestic Violence is only a misdemeanor. I don't know what will happen to him at that point. As part of the restraining order, I'm requesting that he gets therapy for his anger problems. He constantly told me that I was the root of his anger. I know this was just a way to push my buttons, because he has had problems throughout his life due to it.

Overall, I have three things I want of him...I want him to get counseling (which he constantly refused), to admit that he hurt me, and to apologize. I'm still going to divorce his ass, but at least I'll know that he realizes that what he did was wrong.

Now don't be mad, but I had to notify my friend on Sunday. I had been doing so well! I hadn't contacted him for over a week! Anyway, I needed to let him know what was going on in case my hubby tried to get to him. Even though he's out of my life too, it would be unfair not to warn him.

All I ever wanted was a good marriage, a good husband, and to be happy. When I first met him I thought that he was the ONE. I don't know what changed him over the years, but he is definitely NOT the same person I married.

Maybe someday after all this is over, I will find the real ONE.

Thanks for everyone who has been there to support me over the past three days. I have truly made some wonderful friends here!

Wish me luck in court today!


The pic here is my other arm.

horny4770 61M
8158 posts
6/12/2006 2:22 pm

Don't be weak when ya need to strong, dear...YOU CAN leave him alone. I'm not taking his side, he has no right to abuse you...just no reason to add fuel to his fire and justification in his mind. Protect you!

Good Luck in court.

angelofmercy5 60F
17881 posts
6/13/2006 11:36 am

Oh sweetie! I'm so sorry that I haven't been on the blogs very much while my friends are here and with the wedding and all. I am praying for you. Hang on....and be strong. I'll be praying for strength and protection.

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