londongames 37M
288 posts
3/11/2006 10:24 am

Last Read:
3/19/2006 5:19 pm


The car was travelling fast, green blotches whizzing past my window, lots of trees, huddled together, no light for ages…..then all of a sudden, like a slap in the face there was nothing but light.
The trees had broken, and out of the window there was just this…light. And once my eyes had re-adjusted I could see this one tree. In the middle of the field. Standing proudly on its own. Silence…

Then just as quickly as it appeared it was gone and my view was darkened by masses of woodland and density.

I wrote about that once, very straightforwardly

"If you see a lone tree in the middle of a field you are so much more inclined to notice it."

I hate it when people say what’s my point here, cos there isn’t necessarily any point, but WHAT THE FK IS MY POINT?

Oh, right… That tree made me realise something. That I shouldn’t be worried about being who I am, and that if that means that I am alone sometimes there is reason for that, and that I’m proud that I can hold my own without having to rely upon constant support of others…

In love, it leads to me being slightly cast out, under-used maybe. And although I can get lonely without having that…glint in my eye when I’ve found someone I just can’t put down, I realise that when you have those rare occasions to share intimacy with someone they’re so much more heightened & intense.

IT’S THE JOURNEY, NOT THE DESTINATION, true. Which means that on my travels I will come across many things, and when you have sadly acquired a taste for tragedy or sadness in your life its hard to put it behind you and live fully care-free… But I move on and wait for the next thing. The next buzz.

I feel wonderfully blessed that I have a passion in life, and even though the journey has not yet flourished with that passion (my filmwork), I strive forwards knowing it makes me part of who I am. I ENJOY THE JOURNEY.

On a side note, I am hugely philosophical, in a base way, and I look back and details matter to me greatly. Not that I managed to land that dream job. But HOW I managed to land that dream job. Not that I met this particular person, but HOW I met this particular person. The details behind it.

Does anyone else wonder this: Say if you met someone on THIS site. And god for bid you had something more than just a casual encounter….. Would you have a gripe in the back of your mind that you’d met them through these means, and not through some incredibly romantic (fate-like) situation?? Or am I being far too idealistic?

Thoughts please…

Till next time…


caressmewell 54F

3/11/2006 9:56 pm

I've met and made friends with a wonderful group of people and we IM daily and try to get together one night each weekend. I'm not ashamed that I met thm on this site..I would probably not have met them at all if not for this site.

londongames 37M

3/12/2006 12:11 am

thx for your post caressmewell,
i think the fact that you've met people who are now dear friends to you is fantastic, and this site is all about bringing people together, and not always just for sex (as much as some male members would disagree- timber anyone? )..

Ashamed is far too strong a word in this context- if anyone was ashamed to know people from this site they'd have to ask themselves some serious questions about why they were on here... But consider this:

Hypothetically, a girl and a guy meet, they both single, shy, looking for love and find each other, get serious, start a relationship, yada yada yada, until the night before their wedding day the bride's mother in law asks: how did you two meet?

Would that not bring about any embarrassment or awkwardness? I dunno, i'm just curious really, about a thought I had, but It's good to see people defending the AdultFriendFinder cause!!!


BlondieInOz 36F

3/12/2006 1:53 am

Ok You slipped past my defences. I didnt know you are in movies Grrrrr

I have strict rules NEVER to like movie or television or advertising or record copmpany people BUT you are just too nice so youre an honorary not-film person

Ashamed of meeting through this or any other website. I havent thought for a second about that BUT Since you asked.... No. I dont care.

" Ashamed " and "Shame" and "blame" and "Fault" and a heap of labels are words that Im trying to throw overboard before my little ship sinks. Words like that can drown you and they nearly drowned me.

playwithme00000 45F
96 posts
3/13/2006 3:36 pm

I guess I slip and slide between shame and shameless.. and yes at times when I refer to someone or something that has happened, its often unpicked as to how and where ... I like the fact I dont know you all but I sometimes also dislike that. I slip and slide and then sometimes jump from one place to another. A playmate of mine and me have hung out for some time. We enjoy each other and its intense and we know a lot about each other but yes..maybe the way we met means it can only be what it is...a deliciously dark game. .. and yes I think I like those too..its what draws me back. Perhaps I sabatage my own path

Play with me........

londongames 37M

3/13/2006 5:09 pm

hmmm, what a very insightful post.... the duality of this whole AdultFriendFinder phenomenon intrigues me. Are we still getting over our hang-ups with online sites and non-traditional dating methods? Could we blurt out to our family at xmas that "Shinadwa" is in fact a cross-dressing transsexual that we met on a sex site??
Or are all relationships/encounters doomed to fail from this source? I don't think so, I definitely feel I've already met some kindred spirits who I could easily have met in a bar or at a party, or even an evolutionary theorem lecture on a sunday afternoon lol!

BlondieInOz 36F

3/13/2006 7:36 pm

K Will this work Ok... We can all catch a train at the same time from the same place .... somewhere exotic would be best .... everyone nice on AdultFriendFinder I mean .... no names ...we have a long journey So it has to be Oriental Express or a train like that but nice and old fashioned And people move around all over the train and bump into each other and just maybe it will be like meeting for the first time and we can introduce ourselves and make friendships for real all over again.

I know this will work because if you ever fly anywhere or have a long train trip people speak to complete strangers and tell them all sorts of things that they wouldnt tell people they already know even. And everyone will become closer and completely as they truly are inside themselves ( which we get close to here in blogs I think) and then whenever you ask how you met us you can say " Oh I met Blondie and Naomi on a slow moving train from Istanbul. They were smoking Sobraine and sipping Moet" and everyone at the dinner party will stop talking and look at us and envy us. Does that sound better than " I met the tall skinny blonde neurotic and the short beautiful one with the drowning pool eyes at an internet adults dating site".

Does any of that matter? I met my best friend in Sydney last year when I was running and we kept sorta meeting going in opposite directions till she started running my way and kept up with me I dont say " Oh this is my friend Liz who I met running" No. I just say " meet my friend Liz" Or " this is my friend Liz". And if I introduce my brother and sister I dont say " This is my brother or sister' and expand on that by saying we have the same mother and father. How you know someone shouldnt be relevant if you keep it real between you and you shouldnt feel that you need to justify knowing them to anyone or explain anything. Noone else or their thoughts should matter.

Ok raved and raved and its going to be sunrise in 90 minutes and I didnt even mention my train ride fantasy and the images of raindrops and how they climb up a train window when its moving and they look like silver cobwebs and our reflections watch us from the window because at night the window becomes a mirror from the darkness outside the train

BlondieInOz 36F

3/13/2006 7:47 pm

PS I still dont understand the tree imagery

londongames 37M

3/13/2006 8:02 pm

Blondie- i love it! what a great idea...
Did I mention that I am filming some of the Trans Siberian Railway routes this year through my job?? I'll invite you all on that. Deal!

Tree Imagery: hmmm... sounds a bit pretentious, but when u see something standing alone, u notice it more than when it is surrounded by lots of other things... like other trees... It just made sense to me at the time, about how I was feeling about being alone...

BlondieInOz 36F

3/13/2006 8:31 pm

Awww .. K .. I get it now

PS again. This started a poem and now its in my blog

BlondieInOz 36F

3/14/2006 12:03 am

Repeating to myself I am a tree I am a tree I am a tree I am a tree I am a tree standing alone standing alone standing alone

londongames 37M

3/14/2006 7:02 am

quick someone come plant my seeds next to blondie's tree!! QUICK!!

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