Is this what life is supposed to be for me? Continued...  

joelbert 52M
8 posts
7/24/2005 12:59 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Is this what life is supposed to be for me? Continued...

OK....I came off a bit, and I mean a big bit, off the train of thought I wanted to put forth. I guess what I meant to say in my last blog is what I stress I have been through recently, and the recent stuff brings up the past, like pouring salt in a wound. And all that is just simply counter-productive. Sorry for you to waste more rods and cones, but you should read on.

The facts, which I appreciate alot from those who commented, are this: I love me. If I didn't, I'd be dead now, wouldn't I? I looked at myself today in the mirror and thought "If I was dead, that would be a big waste of some really hot dna!" My daughter loves me too, so I know she is very smart and perceptive because she doesn't feel that way towards just anybody. So, as far as being truthful, like my quote, it is what it is.

My confidence has been called into question. You, too, would second guess yourself with the type of women that I have encountered. I guess I don't want to come off too narcistic or too cocky to a woman to let them know how great I really am. To my critics, which I appreciate their input, really, I don't want to come off like I brag or am cocky or just put out a line hoping to catch somone.....but I truly believe that I am something that they wish they all had: a loyal, truly nice, supportive man that has a dream, a house, a car and a one-of-a-kind-very-unique career that she would be proud to be around. I just don't advertise or show it, which is a sort of double-edged sword. I don't advertise the greatness of me, but I really would like to let them know this because I would like to attract them. I guess my modesty is keeping me down, so maybe I need to loosen up and not be so modest anymore. Yes?

Loyalty is another trait that has been called into question. This I take exception to.
I am the most loyal person in the world, to a fault as well. I was loyal before and always will be. I may complain, but not waver my allegance to my friends or my woman. How do I prove this? Simple. I'm a Cubs fan. I'm also a Colts fan, was before when they were bad and still am now when they are championship contenders. Need more, just ask.

Security.....without trust there really is none. I know myself, my limits as well. I've been through alot and come out alive and well. I doubt myself out of modesty, nothing else. My past failures have been like others I have found: few people are trustworthy and honest because they think they can get away with it or scandelize without consequence. Hey folks, I gotta newsflash for ya: you'll get caught and it will burn ya! Not to sound vendictive, but a good friend of mine lost their house, wife, car and kids because of lying to his spouse and girlfriend. Think about it! Players don't just understand that strategy just won't win, and a game it shouldn't be....maybe just a ritual and that's it. Games are for kids or adults that are professionals getting paid millions for entertaining....that's it! I trust me, and a few others trust me too, so that makes us all lucky now, doesn't it?

Security in a material sense, well, I'm there. Just want someone to share it all with, that's all. 'Nuff said.

Tenderness....a trait I don't lack either. I once stopped and bought roses, 3 dozen, at a roadside stand and turned around to drive back to the apartment I had left, just to show that I love her. I would call on my cell when she was at home saying I wouldn't know when I was going to get there and asked who's car was waiting out in front of the house, only for her to be curious, look and see me out front waiting on her. Tenderness is often associated with weakness, which is associated with a lack of self-confidence. All this seems to be very contradicting, but I know this: I know me.
Those who don't take the step to know me are taking 4 steps back in their lives. I know I am a good find. So don't be blind with the loser you are with now. lol

It is easy to find fault in people and look at the bad, but for someone to be lazy and not to also look at my profile and give me a try to find out the great man that may just be a completeness they are or aren't looking for in their life (from fear of success or failure) and not to even ask for an email address to find out more just astounds me. I am guilty of this act too, and I freely admit that. It's real easy to find the bad because it's very easy to find fault. And to be official, I'm not whining, because only losers whine and I am FAR from having an "L" shaped mark on my forehead, thank you very much! lol

I got cynical, not whiney, because it seems that the only thing the women that I was around wanted money. Obviously I wanted sex which all men do, if they say otherwise they are either gay or lying or both. But I wanted more than just sex, though I would settle just for a regular fuck buddy. But a friend, lover and all around partner. Maybe that is why women settle for the lesser man. But settling for the lesser man is like buying a nice coat, then your friend buying a better quality coat for less at another store. In both cases, they just didn't look far enough or read enough of the advertisements.

Don't get me wrong as I have my own faults, just as any other human has. But what I do is love to a fault, more than anything else. I expect anyone to put forth in a relationship, no matter how big or small it is, 110% if not 100%. I expect honesty, and trustworthiness, out of myself and the same out of a woman. If she can't be trustworthy, which is the basis for just about everything, then why go on when it's going to cost more for both in the end?

I'm not being an ass. I just tell it like it is.

I guess what I want to say is this: I'm confident enough to know that the women out there without a man and claim not to want or need a man are lying to themselves. If they weren't looking, they wouldn't be on this site now would they? Think about it.

If you could drive the best car in the world, one that looks good, is affordable and exceeded your expectations, you'd be lying to yourself that you would want to keep it. You can keep it, but maybe you feel that you don't deserve it. Everyone deserves the best, including me. So, make the investment. Why not take the drive and go the distance?


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