The Art of Finger Banging  

jaxndbx 52M
3 posts
8/27/2006 10:07 am
The Art of Finger Banging

The Art of Finger Banging

Being a freelance writer who works with other writers I am subject to a great deal of creativity. New ideas, fresh energy and different perspective are the foundation for creation. My work during the week has an interesting expanse, from writing for, working on a book, and writing stand up comedy. But it took a guy who writes for eBay to bring me back to the fundamentals.

My friend Toby is an avid reader of my print articles and enjoys confirming or denying the lessons in real life. We met for lunch one day and he planted the seed for me to get back to a sexual fundamental that has gotten lost over the years. Finger banging!

I was surprised at his fervor over the subject and it made me question my own foreplay capabilities. Sure all women want you to lick them, but is it not their own finger they use to pleasure themselves when they are alone? Toby was on a rant. It was if he was the shop steward and no one had paid their dues to the finger bangers union. He was a pillar for the pleasure of the female community. “Whatever happened to finger banging?” he said with a voice bigger than Brenda Vaccaro! “Is finger banging dead?” he continued.
“Only someone selfish doesn’t finger bang!” he ranted.

I was impressed by his stance even though we can never eat at that café’ ever again. I love to finger bang personally but will admit there are times I am so damn horny, I just want to please myself and stick it in. I am so preoccupied with my own sexual needs; I forget that God gave us 10 fingers with prehensile grip for a reason. Sure, I want to touch “it”, but the hands are capable of so much more.

In the 70’s Billy Squire sang a song called “Stroke It”. He danced like homo, but boy was he on to something. This, gentlemen is why we call the vagina a pussy. You are supposed to stroke it like a cat. Make it purr and squirm and rub up on you. I am not suggesting you finger bang your cat if you have one because you will go to jail and then get in jail because you fingered a cat. Pay attention!

Men are always about making sure they “get theirs”. How better to ensure this than by making her “grateful” to give it to you. This is not an article about foreplay (that is coming soon). This is a wake up to the male world to have fun with the kitty cat and before you stick your tongue or penis in her, stick your finger in there.

Realistically she wants you to anyway. Logic: If a woman will let you put your penis in her, she will let you put your finger in their. Before you have intercourse you want make sure to get her slippery and wet. You won’t accomplish this by forcing immediate penetration with your dick you dick. So go wash your hands right now. Women love that when you stop to go wash your hands, because they think that is considerate and they know your about to play the gynecological game with their gash.

Fingering makes you look good also. You see your finger is smaller than your penis (I hope), so after you play hokey pokey with your pinky anything will feel bigger to her. I say start with the pinky curled down over the clit into the hole, gently swirling that tiny tip to drive her crazy. Now it is time to cut out the middle man, don’t use each finger like your sizing a ring, and go from the pinky directly to the middle finger. Stroke and explore for a few minutes, then hit with the “shotgun grip”. The shotgun grip is when you combine middle and forefinger together while the bent knuckle of your ring finger massages the rim of her ass. Only give her a small dose of the shotgun grip because it is addictive to her and your penis can not perform this action.

The Ultimate Finger Food
If you are a seasoned lover then you love cunnilingus. The only way you get better at this is by “playing with your food”. The next time you are about to bring your gal to climax through oral, then in the words of the chef Emeril, “Bam-Crank it up a notch!”
As soon as she is about to climax, slowly insert your finger all the way to the bottom of the well. Leave it in there and only move it slightly while you concentrate on the clit. During orgasm her muscles will naturally contract and flutter and your finger will add to the sensation she is having.

NOTE: One clear sign you’re doing something wrong with your hand or fingers is when she grabs your wrist and tries to push it away. Move your hand and tell her, “Teach me.”

Toby may not know it, but his borderline schizophrenic rant on finger banging was very profound. They other diners at the café may not have appreciated his candor at that moment, but like me, I am certain the message resonated with them for a while. Truth is, if anyone from that café got fingered or did the banging that night, they should thank Toby. I just hope they wash their hands first.

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