Thoughts clashing together  

hott4uin32179
(Neil M)
47M
56 posts
4/7/2005 9:09 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Thoughts clashing together

I'm a little down this morning. It seems the gal that was to be my 'teacher' has decided to forego that experience, and settle in with someone more into the scene and experienced. We had a really good discussion going on last night, but unfortunately, it wasn't meant to be. This morning we talked it over and decided to put that possibility behind us. I guess I'm just not cut out to be a 'Dom.' That's all well and good though. After a couple hours of learning about the lifestyle and all, it's not really my gig anyways. I prefer to treat the lady I'm with with some respect, adore her both openly and more so in private. I don't mind it a little rough from time to time, but there still has to be some respect shown for one another.

Calling her a 'slut' even in fun is actually a repulsive image to me. I guess it's all in the way we were raised or something, I just don't seem to be able to get past it. I do, of course, still have my little fantasies about her dominating me, and love an assertive woman. Afterall, for me, spending the days in charge and doing all the decission making and such, I like to unwind, let her take over and run the show in the bedroom.

I've come to accept that the woman I want isn't really one woman at all, but rather a composite of many. The ideal woman, strong, subtle, empathic, even slightly telepathic. Her sensuality, ever present like the air around her. The scent of her perfume lightly enhancing the breeze. Ever so assertive, never settling for second best, yet never forceful or pascifistic, a blend of elegance and perfection. Confidence fills her very soul, she knows who she is, what she wants, and exactly how to obtain it. She needs nothing, doing only as she wants because it pleases her, never out of need, yet rather desire. She has expierenced life, it's ups and it's downs. She's not only intelligant, but savy as to the ways of all walks of life. She prefers the comfort of a nice cotton T and bluejeans, yet makes any dress look good, and can easily adapt to any social setting as if it were second nature to her. A bad evening does not exist to her, as she can take the worst of happenings and view it from a positive vantage point, using it to turn the experience into the most incredable of events. Her eyes, oh so soft and warm, yet can pierce through you like a cold razor, revealing to her your inner most secrets, as if a book left open for all to see.

That is the beginning of woman I seek. Granted just a brief glimpse, and in no way close to the whole of her, but the visualization is there. I see her every day, a little at a time in almost every woman I meet. I can feel her pulling me towards her, yet I know not where she is. IF she exists, it may take me a lifetime to find her, but when I do, an entire life could be lived, enjoyed, and expierenced in the briefest of eye contact with her.


hott4uin32179
(Neil M)
47M

4/11/2005 5:40 am

That my dear is a great question, though only one that you can answer. I could only hope to be that one, but only time and communication can disclose. I could tell you everything you want to hear, but to what ends? I'm in no rush. Exploration and expierence with one another will unlock that door and reveal all. My response, Are you willing to invest the time and effort into discovering the answer?


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