sinking  

honestandreal30 42F
211 posts
3/22/2006 12:51 pm

Last Read:
3/24/2006 12:20 pm

sinking


well some of you new people to visit my blog have expressed my last couple of entries being depressing and making you depressed....WELL I AM SORRY FOR THAT BUT THAT IS HOW I FEEL RIGHT NOW SO JUST DEAL WITH IT!!!! go read blogs before my last 2 poems and maybe you will understand better why i wrote the last 2 poems i posted here.

for those who already have some understanding of my current problems and feelings...WHERE ARE YOU??? not a single post on either of those poems. must say i was quiet suprised.

i am sinking lower instead of digging my way out. besides what has happened to me here and resulted in me turning off my profile my personal life is not much better. Work and school both have got me soooo stressed i don't know what to do any more. it is getting really close to exam time at school and i can't find enough time to do everything. i need to quit my job if i am going to keep up my grades but can't afford to give up my job cause of that little thing called money. i am having problems with my financial aid for summer and fall semesters...if i can't get that fixed then i won't be going back to school after this semester, which ends first week in MAY!!
the closer that the month of MAY gets the deeper i fall...MAy 24th is my mamaw's b-day and May 25th will be 1yr of her passing. Something i have not dealt with still. I spent 3 1/2 yrs living with my mamaw and taking care of her...I have dealt with nothing since she passed...have not been back in her bedroom back to cemetary or anything....have not shed a single tear....but my day of realization is fast approaching and i am terrified,literally. i fought so hard not to accept but it is fast approaching the time i have no choice but to and i do not know how to, or if i can even handle the true reality..

right now...i want what my last two poems have pretty much said....I GIVE UP...i do not want to go on in this life any more.

honest
real


carebearluv2 43F

3/22/2006 8:07 pm

Hera, I am sorry I haven't responded to your email or your last two blog entries. Life has kinda taken over and I haven't been feeling very well lately.

I am sincerely worried about you. Please know that you can email me anytime and add me to your messenger. I will be sending you an email this evening with that information. I will help you through this. I've been there and I have tried it three times. You also know I understand your grandmother as I have written about the loss of mine a few times this year in my own blog.

Life is too valuable and even though it doesn't feel like it now, you have way too much to live for to take your life. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.


tillerbabe 57F

3/23/2006 1:49 am

hang in there! This will pass...

Besides:

You've been Tagged!!!

Here's the deal:

The first player of this game starts with and shares "6 weird/things/habits/oddities about yourself" and people who get tagged need to write a blog sharing THEIR 6 weird habits things, oddities.

At the end you need to choose the 6 people to be tagged and list their names. Don't forget to leave a comment that says "you are tagged" in their latest blog post and tell them to read yours.


Refer to:

[post 281291]


honestandreal30 42F

3/23/2006 8:12 am

    Quoting carebearluv2:
    Hera, I am sorry I haven't responded to your email or your last two blog entries. Life has kinda taken over and I haven't been feeling very well lately.

    I am sincerely worried about you. Please know that you can email me anytime and add me to your messenger. I will be sending you an email this evening with that information. I will help you through this. I've been there and I have tried it three times. You also know I understand your grandmother as I have written about the loss of mine a few times this year in my own blog.

    Life is too valuable and even though it doesn't feel like it now, you have way too much to live for to take your life. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
carebear..understand about life taking over..no prob...i await to receive your email...have nothing yet...don't worry about me to much, i want do anything stupid, even if i have tried in the past

honest
real


honestandreal30 42F

3/23/2006 8:14 am

    Quoting tillerbabe:
    hang in there! This will pass...

    Besides:

    You've been Tagged!!!

    Here's the deal:

    The first player of this game starts with and shares "6 weird/things/habits/oddities about yourself" and people who get tagged need to write a blog sharing THEIR 6 weird habits things, oddities.

    At the end you need to choose the 6 people to be tagged and list their names. Don't forget to leave a comment that says "you are tagged" in their latest blog post and tell them to read yours.

    Refer to:

    [post 281291]
i am haning tiller...literally......thanks for the tag...not

honest
real


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