If I typed like I talk...  

heavn1 56F
414 posts
9/4/2006 7:26 pm

Last Read:
9/22/2006 9:50 am

If I typed like I talk...

I swear, not a soul on here would understand a word that came out across my keyboard! It was hard enough, growing up after my parents divorced. We moved to Missouri with Mama and all started new schools. Going from a tiny podunk town (where everyone knew everyone else) to a big city was scary itself. But the first time I went to school and opened my mouth, holy! Needless to say, I learned quick to either change how I spoke or shut the hell up. Guess which venue I took?

To this day, I still struggle to maintain some control over how I speak. However, there are just some things, certain words, that I cannot say no matter how desperately I try. Words as simple as dryer, or bile...at times, even sugar. I say these and people stare at me like I have spoken some God-forsaken heathen language. And in my profession, we write everything down. We have to. Now, those of us from the south know all too well the true meaning of the term 'caddywhompus'. But type it into a chart up here in the north, and JCAHO is all over you, trying to figure out what you meant. Congressional hearings with the , AMA, ANA and FBI are initiated. Your phone is tapped, neighbors no longer speak to you, and the mailman is terrified to deliver mail anywhere on your street.

People have told me that when I drink, I'm hysterical because then my true identity comes to life. I admit it, I have no control and I'm too happy on 1/2 a beer, so for my own safety, I don't drink. Last time I did, I asked for a Bud Ice and ended up with something I couldn't drink using my hands. I later found out that he thought I'd asked for a blow job. Ok, maybe that was why he was smiling and making sure my glass was never empty. And, my friend on this site can make testimony to my happiness and verbiage when I drink. She laughed hysterically at me when we were growing up. I love her to death, but still never fail to remind her to bite me every chance I get.

So basically, if I typed like I tawkd, then wodnt none yall evah unnerstan a lil ol word I evah sayd, cos Gawd nos I caint doit mahself. Ima busy gittin caddywhompused!


drivinthrough 62M

9/4/2006 7:53 pm

I love it. no one seems to be able to understad me either 'cause Sometimes I get in a hurry t get something out and my Utah accent comes out heavy.

rm_malvolio69 56M

9/6/2006 6:09 pm

well being originally from arkansas myself......i can completely understand what you mean girl. i lost my dialect through grad school and intensive speech work.......but when i go back home........i fall right into it again.......

wanderlust0420 49M
15 posts
9/7/2006 3:19 pm

I too am originally from the south. I understand each and every syllable of your last paragraph. I think that it should be mandatory for everyone in America to spend at least one month south of the Mason Dixon line and be forced to consume massive amounts of sweet tea and grits and maybe the world would be a better place

Make any sense?

heavn1 56F

9/7/2006 3:23 pm

LOL, MzHuny...I'm so grateful for ya darlin'! And mal sweetheart, I know what you mean. I just got back from TN today and everyone's looking at me like I have lost my mind and am speaking some weird language known only by infants. hehehe



rm_malvolio69 56M

9/8/2006 4:18 pm

haha....i know the feeling heavn.....i know the feeling.

heavn1 56F

9/9/2006 10:10 am

Woooooooooooo Hooooooooooo....folks that speak my lingo!

One of my granny's favorite sayings was "I'ma fixin ta git it" Somehow, I managed to pick it up and now my girls say it as often as I do.


farmerj16384 54M
21 posts
9/16/2006 10:14 pm

keep the southern drawl dont change for others

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