This Masquerade  

rm_harshawj 52M
761 posts
8/9/2005 5:55 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

This Masquerade

It is truly an amazing thing, the personas we portray. We all seem to be lost in a masquerade sometimes, putting up a front for everyone to see. Sometimes we are funny and other times we call for sympathy, but mostly we don a day to day mask that may not really be us.

I find that this blog, at least for me is the closest I come to being unmasked. Or should I say that I let my masks show more than I do in my daily life. I think that a lot of us bloggers are like that. In order to write what we write, some of us must bare who we are in ways that are unexpected, even to us.

A mask slips and we show that we are sensitive and emotional, something that co-workers, friends or even family may not know. Another costume falls and we show that we have a level of kink that we would not willingly show the outside world.

For me I know that some of this comes out in the short stories that I write, and more so in the erotica of late. Maybe this is revealing too much of myself, but I know, and only after I write it, that these words are me and if I harbor secret fantasies and longings they tend to reveal themselves though these creative words. In my longer stories I tend to reveal my ideology and these are much deeper and more scandalous (sometimes) than the fantasies that I pen.

Then there is the aspect of creating an illusion for ourselves through the writing. We do this by portraying ourselves as what we would ideally like to be. It is not the hard truth or reality, but is the divine truth of our longed for self image. And in this way, creating the illusion for the blog, we get to experience the allusion of the illusion. We revel in it, we accept the kudos, we pontificate from it, but when we leave the blog we ultimately are who we are. And being who we really are is the greatest illusion of all, for it is so perfect that we may even delude ourselves that this person, me, is who I want to be.

The illusions are many, the humorist, the intellectual, the physical, the spiritual, the metaphysical, the transcendental, and the list goes on. We are lost in a world of illusions, and there are zones here in blogland that are more shrouded in the illusions, and there are some that are less. For me, I hope that my blog is a representation of me as a less "intentionally" clouded place.

"We all have out illusions, far be it for me to take away yours."
--- Mok to Angel, "Rock & Rule", 1978, Nelvana Productions

This Masquerade
By George Benson & Leon Russell

Are we really happy with this lonely game we play
Looking for words to say
Searching but not finding understanding anyway
We're lost in this masquerade

Both afraid to say we're just too far away
From being close together from the start
We tried to talk it over but the words got in the way
We're lost inside this lonely game we play

Thoughts of leaving disappear
every time I see your eyes
No matter how hard I try
To understand the reason why
we carry on this way
We're lost in a masquerade

We could just start over
but it's oh so hard to do
When you're lost in a masquerade

sincitybrunette 56F
1668 posts
8/9/2005 10:59 pm

that is what is so great about being able to put into words what you are feeling or thinking at the time. Its not a matter of putting on or taking off a mask, but feeling secure enough in yourself to put it in writing....I love what you write and how you write it.

lushgirl69 50F

8/19/2005 9:03 am

That happens to be one of my favorite songs from childhood...Iremember sitting in the back seat of the family car listening to George Benson's greatest hits on the eight track...i stillhave all the words memorized...
Masks are easier, they give us the opportunity to be that which we want to be or even what we think others want.
I havve a deep and abiding affection for costumes, wigs anything of that nature. I lived at an Art Gallery for about three years ( it was also an artists studio collaborative) and we held an event every February which consisted of erotic art. Each weekend, there was a different theme, with a fetish ball for the finale. Each weekend, I would dress differently, adorn different hair colors and styles...It was amazing to me how many individuals never realized, introducing themselves again each event, wouldn't realzie that they had met me previously...In my opion, that speaks to the fact that many people don't really want to see beyond the physical manifeatation that is right in front of them...Red hair, blonde, short or long, they don't really see you anyway...Words cut through this sometimes, depending on whether it is just a persona, but again, it is the desire to visualize reality in it that makes people actually connect on a concrete level.....
Keep on a-bloggin' me, baby (to the tune of Steve Miller's...Keep on a- rockin'.....

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