duststormdiva 52F
7253 posts
6/16/2005 2:05 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm


My father was recently hospitalized because of a collapsed lung. Watching him in the ER that night was the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life. He is a small 90 pound man who is deteriorating because of emphysema and congestive heart failure. He is so weak and I really felt that he was going to take his last breath that night. I was scared.

As my friends get word of his illness, it amazes me how many men think the best way to get my mind off my stress is to talk sex. Sure I love sex just as much as the rest, and I certainly enjoy entertaining conversation with the vivid imagination that lies within each of us.

I feel that I have been preyed upon. I feel that men are thinking the following:

"Oh, she is stressed, she just needs a good fucking!"

"Her defenses are down, now I will do her with a cyber conversation. I know she does not like that, but I'll get her to take her mind off her troubles."

"I'll take her mind off her worries, I'll distract her by tempting her with sex."

I could be wrong, but I just feel that people are so damned insensitive at times.

I mentioned to a friend how I needed a massage, and he offered me one, but mentioned that massages could lead to other things. I told him that I was always up for that.

Okay, yes I admit I am usually up for the immediate physical touch of a man, but I am not up for sex chat every time I get online with a friend. I think about sex all the time, but there is so much more to my thoughts than sex. When I am online, maybe I just want to talk, vent, or surf the net. Even when I am not stressed I don't want to cyber. If sex is going to be involved, I want the real thing!

If you really want to make me feel better, forget about my stress, then talk to me, show compassion, understanding, empathy, hold me. Let me be the one to tell you that I want more.

I am not saying all men have been this way, but damn the few that have really show their true colors to me. I could be wrong, and I have been known to be wrong.

Maybe I should clarify that it's not the men from AdultFriendFinder that are pissing me off, but men I know from another network. I just needed this area to vent.


nightstogether 58M

6/18/2005 12:20 pm

When your father comes out of the hospital again and returns home, take the time to be with him and talk to him. Make sure that all those things you're wishing you had said before are said now. Now is the time to concentrate on him and your relationship with and to him. Nothing else matters.

private-intellectual (.de)

duststormdiva 52F
6854 posts
6/19/2005 6:26 am


My father and I have a great relationship. We talk all the time. A day does not go by that I don't tell him I love him. He is one of my most favorite people on this earth. I visit with my father every day. His health is so bad, it's inevitable, I know his day will be soon. Actually, I am surprised he lasted this long. I did't think he would. He told me the other day when I went to see him at the hospital that he was going to fight it as long as he can. That man is amazing!


rm_talldarkavg1 107M
10172 posts
6/20/2005 12:01 pm

Diva Diva Diva. Obviously you don't realize that sex in the ER is commonplace. Sex in the ICU however, does require gloves and a mask. Sex in the hallways and chapel, although permitted, do require holding the screaming down to a minimum. And sex in nurse's station, well that's just everyone's favorite. My poor naive sweetie.

Your relationship with your father is exactly what every man dreams of from his children. You're a good daughter, good woman, and wonderful person. My thoughts are with you.

[blog talldarkavg1]

duststormdiva 52F
6854 posts
6/20/2005 7:50 pm

Again Talldark, you make me laugh. Thanks! You know I really don't like holding the screaming down to a minimum, so I will stay away from the chappen and hallways.


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