what did we just do?!  

drkwaterz 37F
155 posts
7/26/2006 8:38 am

Last Read:
7/27/2006 9:45 am

what did we just do?!

Despite knowing the fact that I have always exercised escellent self-control, I have found that as the time passes and moments begin to hold more passion and lust than before. For as much as I would like to say that my resolve remains in tact, I know fully it does not. I allowed my desires to overcome my better judgement. Though I have no regrets and as satisfied as I am (more than once and incredibly powerful lol), I find myself now in limbo. Not knowing of what comes next or how to respond.

I can only assume that the person I shared this experience with is in the same state of confusion, seeing as how we both shared the same misgivings. Seems like for as hard as I tried to rationalize things, I can't seem to come up with anything. Though we did discuss the matter, after the fact, I was still left in a daze as to what to do now. It somehow feels as though things are apt to evolve into more, but the real question is am I ready for that? Could I handle this transformation and all that comes with it? Or perhaps things will remain as they are, though I have a feeling that it won't be the case, for long anyway.

For as much as a clear cut answer to my dilemma would be nice, I know no such thing exists. Now that feelings are involved, I see it ending up one of four ways. Either I get hurt,they get hurt, we both get hurt, or things actually work, which the likelihood of that last one, as we all know is very rare indeed.

For now all I can do is wait and see. Expect the worst and pray for the best.

rm_douglhers 42M
150 posts
7/26/2006 6:50 pm

To answer the title i don't know but the question that i have is was it worth it to you....Is your potential pain for the human contact and exchange of emotion and intimacy? If i had to answer that question the answer would be YES, No one knows where time will lead you, but it will...I have also felt confusion similar to yours in the recent past and wait is all i can do...I feel so bad for you knowing how you feel...

rm_Gordy012000 47M

7/27/2006 12:10 am

Um.....I guess I get the jist of what you are getting at. Should I assume that you hooked up with a guy and had sex and now you both are developing feelings for each other?

Why do you feel you have to do anything? Why not go with the flow? If things materialize then let them. I think we may have a few things in common. I'm ever watchful and skeptical and that in itself has prevented me from obtaining comfort and in many cases "happiness". For every 1 woman I date there are 10 women that I blow off. I do this cause they are not right for me in one way or the other. Could it be said that I have a fear of intamacy? Maybe so, but I know I have the vision of happiness in my head and I'm sure in some cases....if I wasn't looking for fault then I may have achieved it.

I have noticed these same habits in all of us. We all have our fears of being hurt and in some ways those fears keep us in a constant state of skeptisism and prevent us from obtaining bliss. Why not blindly follow your heart and not worry about the ramifications? As easy as it is to say that, I know first hand that my psyche will not allow me to do so. So what are we doing to ourselves? Are you content with being alone and never having that one spirtual partner, friend or lover? I think thats what you need to accept if you never let yourself run free and take chances. Thats my life in a nutshell. Am I happy? No I'm not, I'm just content and "content" is safe. I have been content with my life for a very long time and thats the way it will continue. Is that the life you want for yourself? I wouldn't want you to have my life. My life may be safe and "trauma free" but I have desires and dreams which I hold myself back from achieving out of fear and security.

Please take in mind that while writing this to you I'm constantly going back to your post and reading it over and over. Your kinda vague and I want to make sure I understand you correctly and not making myself look foolish by writing this huge and insightful response only to have it be totally be about something else other then what you are trying to get at. So......take what I just said and now I have the same confusion as you....lol!! Now here's the part where I firmly grasp you by the shoulders and shake you saying "just say what you really want to say.....stop being vague cause your making it hard on me to give you what you want"!!!!

Did I just put words to the confusion you are feeling?? Now shed your clothes and jump on that mustang and ride girl....RIDE!!! Ride blindly into the future!! Don't worry bout your boobs flopping around while riding that mustange!! Just smile and be happy!!

The security code I must type to post this response is 420. Too bad I don't smoke weed huh?

drkwaterz 37F

7/27/2006 9:45 am

LMAO. Very insightful. In my next post I'll be abit clearer about what has now occured and How I have put all the advice I have received into play. Let me know what you guys think!

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