Men...We're Happier,Simpler creatures..!!  

daighi 50M
1627 posts
7/19/2006 2:27 pm

Last Read:
7/21/2006 12:04 pm

Men...We're Happier,Simpler creatures..!!

Hi there,i got this from a lady friend of mine,& i thought i'd share it with you all.I hope that you enjoy it?


Your last name stays put,it never changes.

The garage is all yours.

The Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Chocolate is just another snack.

Your more likely to become a President.

You can never be pregnant.

You can wear a white t-shirt in a water-park.

You can wear NO t-shirt in a water-park.

Car Mechanic's will always tell you the truth.

You never have to drive to another restroom because this one is icky.

You don't have to stop & think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

Same work more pay.

Wrinkles ADD character to your face.

Wedding Dress..$5000 Tuxedo..$100 rental.

Hair treatments/perms..$100/$200 Crop haircuts..$25 tops.

People never stare at your chest when they talk to you.

The occasional well rendered belch is almost expected of you.

New shoes don't blister or mangle your toes or feet.

One mood all the time.

Phone conversations normally last 30 seconds flat.

You know stuff about tanks???

A five day vacation requires just one suitcase.

You can open all your jar lids.

You get extra gredit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

If someone forgets to invite you,him/her can still remain friends with you.

Your underwear costs just $8.99 for a pack of three.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You almost never have a problem with a strap in public.

You are unable to see the wrinkles in your shirt/clothes.

Everything on your face remains the same original colour.

The same hairstyle can last for years,or even decades.

You only HAVE to shave your face & neck if you wish.

You can play with toys all your life.

Your big belly normally hides your big hips.

One wallet,One belt,One pair of shoes,One Colour for all seasons.

You can wear shorts no matter what you legs look like.

You can "Do" your nails with your teeth or a pocket knife.

You have freedom of choice over growing a moustache.

You can do your Christmas shopping on the 24th of Dec,but ALL your family presents,in just 25 minutes.

No wonder men are SO happy!

So whats YOUR slant on all this?



"Always remember...keep smiling!"



moonlightphoenix 46F
6508 posts
7/19/2006 3:05 pm



HBowt2 60F

7/19/2006 3:57 pm

yes.....but we get to add multi to lots of things...

BaronessK 53F

7/21/2006 8:16 am

My last name stays put regardless; hereditary title, so nah!

I do DYI...and if I can't have half the garage HE can 'DIY'!

What's plans? Courthouse, a J.P., and a bottle of good vino.
{Alternative: Who said I was going to MARRY the useless wanker anyway?! }

Chocolate covered 'bananas'....

I'm more likely to cum for a president; think of the 'fame and fortune'!

It's called a tubal, ya stud!

What's the big deal about white shirts anyway?

Those guys told me they wouldn't mind in the least if I went shirtless....

Car Mechanics tell me the truth...about my 1989 Oldsmobile Custom Cutlass Calais 4-Door Station Wagon with the F1 engine and fuel injection...with the under-the-seat 2-shot pearl-handled derringer {with hollow point ammo}. Dunno why....

*I* can pee standing up; I can hold it in a lot longer than a guy can, but since I can also do it standing up....

I don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt...ANY kind of 'nut'....

Same work, more pay; wanna bet? Female with law background....

Wrinkles may not add 'character', but we'll still have some old geezer chasing us on his wheeled walker no matter how old we get!

Dress? I bet I fill out a tux better than YOU do!

'Fuck me' hairstyle -- about same cost as it was when I started wearing it that way over a decade ago.... {And still as much 'fun'! }

People don't listen anyway, so what does it matter what they're staring at?

My second husband taught me how to belch; he was so proud you'd have thought I gave him a son!

If they don't fit...I have to quit.

One mood all the time -- 'Baroness'....

No hello or goodbye, and if it's before noon it better be something I gave birth to, an emergency, or obscene! Otherwise, it better be over in 30 seconds; answering machine.

*I* know things about tanks -- military, aquatic, tops, booze nights....

A 5 day holiday requires only one suitcase...because I know how to PACK! {Includes laptop with electrical adapters and built in wireless}.

What's with the jar thing? Like I've freaking canned anything?!

I am expected to remind you constantly of every thoughtful thing I have ever done for a male anyway.

I am not particularly a 'people person' I care cuz...?

As a female who said I had to WEAR underwear?

One pair of feet, one pair of shoes; why you got THREE pair?

Strap 'adjustment' does not phase guys, though; just gives them excuse to stare at boobs some more.

I can read the label and buy things that are wrinkle free.

I can walk around all the time without makeup and it's 'extra' because it's "natural"; when I do wear it, guys oooh and ahhhh. If y'all wear it, even chapstick...hmmmm....

I've had this hairstyle since kid was 4 years old; he's 19 -- 'just been fucked' style never goes out of style!

I don't HAVE to shave anything...remember, I have the pussy!

If I wanted to, I could have better 'toys' than any guy!

Like guys notice female's not 1 of 2 things, eh/belch!.

Two words: Basic Black {and we look classy, not like we're on the way to a funeral}.

We can wear shorts no matter what, and not worry about 'dangling'.

We can do nails with one sharp file AND make a guy worry and not be illegal or redneck.

Again, not where a guy is looking.... {Hairier women have more tetosterone, hence more sex drive, like a guy...think about that!}

Go for it...saves me the trouble of shopping at all!

We are SUPPOSED to have mood swings, never know what we want, change our minds all the time, can get sex anytime we want to AND be able to do it on second's notice, and best of a woman...we don't have to figure them out! As one woman said: With what I've got, I can go out and get what you've got 7 nights a week -- can you?

rm_iwannatellu 46F
933 posts
7/21/2006 10:34 am

yes, well, we have boobs, and you don't. HA HA

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