Erratic moods/minds  

complexlysimple 35M
894 posts
5/30/2006 7:41 pm

Last Read:
12/16/2006 8:00 pm

Erratic moods/minds


Tonight my mind is moving much too fast for my own good.

Seeing everyside of an agruement at once ...needless to say it makes life confusing...

So rightly, or wrongly I'm under the impression that there might be someone might really want to know about me ... and recalling memories doesn't really require thinking so I should be okay if I just recite and not analyze ...

Hmm, something interesting about me....

My friendships.

The guy that I trust the most is one -outside of my family- that I've fought with the most. He's said I'm crazy/insane and I've said he's rather dumb ...we've agreed with each others assesment before so we've become friends -that was maybe 7 years ago?

Otherwise growing up and going to school I never really had the same group of friends from one year to the next until I was halfway through high school.... needless to say I've hung out with a lot of interesting people ....bigots, potdealers, jocks, geeks, etc, etc...

But I never really been close to anyone.... well except my ex (? -I really don't know if that's the righ term, but it works)

She was pretty much intrigued by my mind and the way I can twist things around ...unfortunately she also wanted to understand me ... stupidly enough I eventually gave into that request and shared ..more than I probably should have ..she got terrified, didn't tell me and things pretty much blew up.... that was almost 2yrs ago(???) ...the thing is, thinking about it can still rip me apart like it happened yesterday ...damn me and my caring about people

As for being around women, highschool yeah somewhat ...though it didn't help that occasionally if I was just talking to a woman .. some guy would start yammering about us having children ... kind of a conversation killer..

College was a bit better though again nothing all that close ...

Actually I end up being more of an item of curiousity or a reference book than someone to get involved with ...or so it seems.

Not surprisingly, I'd like that to change....

Maybe someone will find that of interest maybe not... I'm not you, so I don't know what you find interesting...

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