about the boy who's been driving me crazy:  

catastrophegirl 42F
975 posts
8/27/2006 8:54 am
about the boy who's been driving me crazy:

i had thought i had seriously screwed this thing up by communicating too much, being too present. and by not answering the phone the other night because of my stupid prepaid minutes and then not being able to get online to talk to him until it was too late for him to be awake.

he's moving to tennessee. not before wednesday because wednesday is his son's 4th birthday.
this was his weekend to see his son. he broke it into two day visits. last night around 2 am he called and asked me to come over. so i did. he had a neighbor over so we sat around talking for a bit about politics and such.
and sat for a while and watched him play his guitar. stupid boy asks for this to be a no strings attached thing last week and then sits around and plays bob dylan on his guitar and sings to me.

his neighbor left, we talked for a bit.
a few choice bits of conversation:

me: "i'm glad you called"
he: "i wasn't going to leave without calling you."
me: "i know this is probably the last time we ever see each other."
he: "i'll be coming back to see my son. i want to see you then too"
me: "i have to tell you, i fucked this up. i now care about what happens to you and i want you to take care of yourself"
he: "i really need that right now"

then this morning as i was leaving
me: "well, this is goodbye then i guess"
he: "i'll see you again before i go. i have to see you before i go"

grrr.. why does he have to go and give me hope and stuff? i could have reconciled this being it. it was just a short thing, supposed to be a casual thing. now it's all kinds of messy

Become a member to create a blog