Back in the saddle  

blueeyedmurder3 60F
40 posts
7/9/2005 6:20 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Back in the saddle

It's an interesting concept, a blog. While I'm not sure I want everybody to read my exploits, it's a great place to get some creative writing in - and keep track of what's happened.

Our divorce was final in June. I only waited til the separation agreement was put together to get back out there. Our sex life had died - and a rather adventuous friend suggested AdultFriendFinder - because it seemed to be specificly designed for my needs right now - that is, good sex, friendship, but no attachments.

Realistically, you struggle with that concept as much as you don't want to. It would be great if I could have unemotional sex - but it seems to be impossible. At least I have to LIKE my partner before Having sex with them. And "like" can lead to other things.

But I've figured out that a traditional "love" relationship with straight sex will never satisfy me. I know this because I tried it, and married the guy - even after our sex life had fizzled. So right now, I'm busy redefining my sexual preferences - and telling everybody that I NEVER want to be married again.

Well at least I never want to be married again if the experience is anything like that last one - being controlled - facing hostility at home every day for years and years. I suppose you never know when the right person may wander into your life.

But realizing now how very kinky I seem to be, it seems to be that any man who is as kinky as I am probably thinks the same way! I only want to be controlled in ONE area of my life - and if we are to speak traditionally, it's in bed!

Whether it may NOT be in bed is the issue right now. I hope that becomes clear soon.

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