blondietickler 44F
76 posts
4/26/2006 8:02 pm

Last Read:
5/2/2006 10:05 pm


Let's see who might be able to give some advice for this some what mixed up girl. This is the situation so far: the man I am married to took off in August of last year. He left with all the money we had, the only vehicle we had, and left me locked out of the house. So now that you kinda know the drama here is the situation. He called me finally and let me know that he was alive and living in a rehab for gambling in Las Vegas. Great place to be don't you think. I have made up my mind and know that I will divorce him after all he did, but I keep thinking that I need to wait till he is out of his program. I don't want to kick him while he is down because that is not the person I am or will be. So what would you do? Let me know.

LilSquirt_4mfm 68M/68F
3394 posts
4/26/2006 8:51 pm

uh hu ... and after he's out .. .what then .....


blondietickler replies on 4/27/2006 8:55 am:
it is finished as far as i am concerned. i just don't want to do any damage while he is trying to better himself. by the way i am not giving him any hope that we will get back together either.

southernsportmod 56M

4/27/2006 6:23 pm

well it is hard to think of, you do have a child to consider, one day she might want to know why daddy is not here, unless she is smart for age and understands the situation. The only thing that I can think of is to be polite and think of your child, BUT do not give in to him, when he took off, he left behind all responcabilty of his child, that is unforgivable, no matter what the home conditions were. Be firm and both of you continue on with your lives, unless he is abusive, try to maintain the father- daughter relationship if it is possible, if he does not earn it, then hell with him.

blondietickler replies on 4/27/2006 8:34 pm:
ok let me explain a little more. he was not her biological father, but was the only father in her life for 5 years. the home condition was great, i gave him all my money, worked full time, cooked meals from home and kept a clean house. did i forget to say i also served him his meals. was in 3 church programs and raised a child. he was responsible(or i thought) for the bills and working. we never fought. and i mean ever. so what do you think of that. do tell.

southernsportmod 56M

4/27/2006 8:45 pm

that is a diffucult thing to answer,I have never been in your position so it is hard to say. How is your child taking it, does she miss him? Do you still care for him? I guess that has alot to do with how you handle this. Personaly, if a woman did that to me I would just try to muddle on, continue with my life as best as I can, still it is hard not to be bitter about it.

blondietickler replies on 4/27/2006 10:00 pm:
i think she kind of missed him at first. i know i did. but i asked her what her opinion of this is and told her to think about it before she responded. i also said don't say what she wants me to hear, but what is in her heart. i will always care for him, but not that way ever again. i did my best and that was all i could do. right. why be bitter? it happened, grow up, get over it and try and have a good life. i am still in that process so i will let you know if i ever get there. lol. i am usually a happy person and like to stay that way if possible. he and i were together for 5 years and that does have an impact. but it is an experience i got and will have forever. enough for now.

Djeeper1987 48M

4/30/2006 10:11 pm

wow, that totally suxs. I am sorry have to go thru that. I have never been married, however common sense tells me to wait and see him in person or get a lawyers advice.
However in the final tally, you have to make the tough decision as to what the next step will be. I think only what we as your fellow bloggers can do is just support you emotionally.

Carpe Diem

blondietickler replies on 5/1/2006 7:27 am:
thank you for the support. i appreciate that more than you know.

Become a member to create a blog