Poor Little Pathetic Girl  

blackstiletto 34F
122 posts
3/27/2006 10:22 am

Last Read:
7/18/2006 11:31 am

Poor Little Pathetic Girl

I was going through a dear friend's blog when in one of his posts titled '[post 272965]', I saw that I left a tiny, seemingly unsignificant comment saying that... 'Sometimes I'd rather not find out if a guy likes me."

What a lot of people don't know is... I was being serious.

Obvious Sign #1: I KNOW a guy likes me when he calls or SMSes me daily just to say 'Hi'.

Obvious Sign #2: I KNOW a guy likes me when he offers to make me special herbal tea and drives all the way to see me when I was feeling under the weather.

Obvious Sign #3: I KNOW a guy likes me when he digs for my e-mail (which is very, very elusive) from mutual friends and sends me a sweet one saying that he thinks I'm cute.

I know, I know, I know... but I really wish I didn't know. The worst thing is that all three signs came from three DIFFERENT people! They're all really sweet guys but how do you deal with all the attention ESPECIALLY when you know that you don't feel the same way? If I hadn't known that these men liked me in some way, I wouldn't have to feel so bad now, would I? I'm crushing my brains out just trying to figure out how to let them down gently. I dread every time they offer to do something nice. You say no but they'll insist and push it in your face so much until it's not even a fucking question anymore that it makes you feel like you owe them a fucking sexual favour for it. Any kind of favour will do lah. I can't deal with this right now. I hate it so much. I hate it so much because the ONE guy that I DO like is completely ignoring me.


rm_donnied3261 42M

3/27/2006 5:23 pm


birchingphobia 41M

3/28/2006 5:00 am

Best wishes from me too! Share the outcomes with me ok? Hehehe!

rm_ProX2004 47M
7 posts
3/28/2006 5:10 am

I prefer if it happens naturally..., most of the time i do it with sincererity and no obligation. If a woman says no....i take it like man. been there b4.
so it's better to respect a woman's decision.
But if it's a Yes!! then there's a spackle which goes both ways.
it's Fun & interesting when it happens.

fwolfc 44M
519 posts
3/29/2006 12:35 pm

"Sometimes the best kind of "knowing" is not knowing at all..."
(In Yoda's Voice)

Whoever it is..., he'll wake and realise what he's been missing....

Good Luck.....

lithiumrose 39F

3/31/2006 4:13 am

hugs ... want an exchange?

Life is weird, sometimes, but like someone said to me once, it is never complicated, so don't look for things to make it worse. So .. yeah - don't tear your treases and maul your grey matter about it. It just worsen then whole uncomplicated stuff into one whole big pile of complicated and complex shit.

alvin6980 39M
3 posts
4/4/2006 12:53 am

I know how u feel now... I used to be like that. Trying to charm her with all d little favours. Writing sweet sms to her every single morning & nite.

Well, u just need to let em go gently. Go ahead with ur life... live a life of ur own. Go out there & try new things.

alvin6980 39M
3 posts
4/4/2006 12:58 am

reach me at alligotis via hot mail

rm_boogieass 47M
23 posts
4/6/2006 5:49 am

My empathies... been on both sides of the fence myself when it comes to unwanted attention : p.

For what it's worth, I think your best bet is to be honest AND gentle with them, asap. Otherwise they could push you into becoming honest AND brutal.

As for your guy, re: Obvious Signs #1-3. He would have to be a total Homer not to pick up on your feelings.

Good luck. Btw think you're one helluva blogger : )

blackstiletto 34F

4/12/2006 1:24 am

OMG. *lol*

I really didn't realize that one tiny post could generate so much interest (or concern?). I really thank those who actually called me because of what I wrote. It's been a while but it shows that underneath our backbreaking lives, we do care for others whether or not we know it.

aqish, birch, ProX, wolf, lithium - hugs to you all for being such champions in my life.

I'm writing a response (sequel?) to this blog entry. So do read it up if you're interested to know what has happened since then til now.

Next time,


rm_tocho81 36M
6 posts
4/13/2006 10:12 am

Sorry to read that these guys seem to be after you, to be honest I have done something similar to 'Obvious Sign 2' for people whom I consider to be just friends even though I don't know them very well..but the other 2 signs - wow that is blindingly obvious haha

I do hope you confront them and remind them that you're not interested in pursuing a relationship, it would be a lot better than just cutting off contact with them - have you tried just being firm in letting them know you don't like the excessive attention? I've been guilty of giving a girl too much attention before, she always accepted it happily but secretly she hated it..many years later I found out and well..it hurts because I never knew you know? I always thought of her as a friend which is why I gave her so much attention...anyway your guys do sound like their genuinely interested in you, hope you let them down easy and meet nice guys you want who don't ignore you.


blackstiletto 34F

4/15/2006 10:54 am

tocho81 - Hi dear. I've never really been good at rejecting people. In some cases, I do hope that after a while, they'll just get bored with me and give up. I really don't hate any of them. I was in a really bitchy mood when I wrote this post because I was upset with the circumstances. They're all dear friends and I do appreciate their friendship nonetheless. I'd hate to lose them as friends. When there's so much at stake, I really just let things fly slowly and hope for the better. Thanks for being thoughtful.

Your friend,


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