Is Pain Really, Really Hot?  

bipolybabe 56F
10715 posts
8/10/2006 5:33 pm

Last Read:
8/12/2006 12:23 pm

Is Pain Really, Really Hot?

Frankly, I'm fascinated with the whole BDSM thing. It's scary/exciting. I know what I like is role playing, a la bodice ripper romances. (See [post 407086] and [post 373241])

Spank my ass and tell me what a juicy slut I am, that kind of thing.

But, I've been doing some thinking about the pleasure/pain connection (See Is Pain Necessary for Pleasure). I was thinking more of existential pain, but one of my favorite wickedly funny, smart bloggers, wickedeasy has written a couple pieces on why pain appeals to her personally and why BDSM is such a turn-on.

Find her take on it here: needing the pain

(c) 2006 AskAphrodite aka BiPolyBabe


BPB

Check out my blog Bi-Poly-Babe for more sensual, sexual pleasure!



rm_dosrev 40M
1991 posts
8/10/2006 7:10 pm

In my experience, the more feminist a woman is, the more into submissive or SM play she is. Theres an interesting dichotomy between the fight for equal rights and woman power in life, but the total abondonment of it in the bedroom.

I don't see it as hypocritical or anything, just interesting.

"Enough of this palaver, lets get the show on the road!"
"The best thing about a day like that is that it can't get any worse. It was a bad day AND a Monday. The rest of the week has to be better." - Hotandsteamygirl


toothysmile 51M
16517 posts
8/11/2006 3:00 am

i can't say i'm very experienced in that department. however, with the right person, i certainly would like to explore this. i believe it has more to do with trust than sex. which probably makes it even more exciting.


wickedeasy 68F  
31320 posts
8/11/2006 6:39 am

    Quoting rm_dosrev:
    In my experience, the more feminist a woman is, the more into submissive or SM play she is. Theres an interesting dichotomy between the fight for equal rights and woman power in life, but the total abondonment of it in the bedroom.

    I don't see it as hypocritical or anything, just interesting.
i think this is true as well, most of the women i know who are lifestyle are type A achievers and yet, give us the right Man.........

i don't see it as a dichotomy though, more a recognition of one's own need for balance and the true nature of being a woman - god the feministas are lining up to kill me - but it IS in my nature and i DO want a man who can protect me and care for me and while i don't need one..........it's lovely to have one

i am so PIC that i apologize up front BPB for any weirdness that ensues and thank you for the pimp

You cannot conceive the many without the one.


howaboutahuck 67M
489 posts
8/11/2006 11:41 am

Pains not for me. I like sensual love making, full of passion, feeling and caring. Frank said it best, Nice and easy does it every time.


rm_agathon12 47M
1311 posts
8/11/2006 6:45 pm

Wickedeasy is very good about explaining her perspective with regards to it. I've found her writings to be very thought provoking. My meagre experience tells me that it can be quite hot but it also requires quite a bit of research to be able to make it something special. Great paintings almost always are studies in chiaroscura and it would seem that truly great sex also requires that "shadow" element of pain to sharpen the pleasure. Just my two cents....


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