In discussion with friends recently....  

benibluetwo 48F
799 posts
12/20/2005 1:50 pm

Last Read:
1/6/2010 8:48 pm

In discussion with friends recently....

I have come to realize that it is harder and harder to define love and lust.

Maybe not define it so much as to realize if someone lusts after you. We all covet someone and feel that any move we make will turn us into a laughing stock.

Of course, any advances we make will HAVE to take place during a huge public event with the microphone right in front of us as it's all being televised on CNN.

..........mmmmmmmmmm........CNN.........mmmmmmmmmmm.........Anderson Cooper.........oh....WHAT?

Sorry, but I covet Andy. He's intelligent, articulate and damn funny. Hot too. This of course is one sided lust....absolutely no possiblilty of him lusting after me....unless I finally get that great Canadian epic novel I have been promising myself to write published.....Hmmmmmmmmmmm? Maybe I DO have a chance to meet him? LOL

So do you covet the person in the next cubicle? The cute guy/girl at the store? The person in the flower shop? The bartender?

How do you know if they like you back? This is the problem. How to build the courage to approach that person and say, "Ahem....I...erm...well, here's the liked...."

Do you finish the sentence or do you fumble around and try to cover it by asking for something at the cashier that you don't collapsible earmuffs in hot pink with lime green leopards spots or ANOTHER tin of Tim Horton's coffee when you have seven at home already?

Is this the problem with everyone...why we are all on here looking for romance? Is it easier being on the interweb where there is some anonymity? Or is there? This can one of the most dangerous places to meet people....not AdultFriendFinder specifically....on line does not mean safe.

There are stalkers everywhere and technology makes it easier. For example, a few months ago I Googled myself and it took me ten pages to find myself....last week I did it again and low-and-behold I am the first listing. This kind of scared me.

I am rambling a bit....

I guess lust is visual...see the my bra pix and someone wants to meet me. This is lust.

Love is something much better....I think. Have I ever been in love? I thought I have. But in retrospect was I? It obviously wasn't "can't live without you" love. I have continued to wake up in the morning and deal with my life without the person I thought I loved.

Yes, I get butterflies when certain guys email or IM me. Ones that intrigue me the most....who talk to my mind and not my breasts. But this is lust.

How do you know, or can trust, that lust turns into love when you think you've met the "right" one? What if the person you lust after falls in love with you before you are ready? What is the fine line?

*NOTE: For any guys I email or IM with...NO, I am NOT falling in love with any of you...I am just rambling here.....*

How do you tell someone? How do you tell if they like you so you know if you have the opportunity to talk them? How to take that deep breath before you hit the icy waters of rejection....or could it be the hot tub of romance?

That may not be the best analogy.........could be lots of critters in that hot tub.

Ok, so this has gone off on a tangent I didn't expect. See what happens when I am home alone sick? LOL

Is a raunchy one night stand with a stranger you met at your friends party or in the bar lust? Or is it animal instinct?

Have you ever wondered if that one night stand should/could have been more? Do you ever have regrets that maybe there should/could have been some followup? When is it too late to go back to that person and let them know you are still interested? What if they don't remember you?

I don't think I am helping answer my question at to tell if it's love or lust. How to know if you can approach someone you covet and tell them that.

I guess in the end I would totally appreciate someone having the courage to walk up and say, "You know what? I have liked you for (this long) and I would like to get to know you better. If you don't feel the same way, oh well, but if you do this is my (number/email/alternative form of communication)."

It may throw me off and I'll choke on my fruit medley muffin and burn my tongue on my extra large cafe mocha (with whipped cream topping please)...and I may trip over someone chasing my admirer out the door...but I would completely appreciate it.

Who knows......lust may become love and that might not be a bad thing.




jukeboxhero61 57M

2/2/2006 6:54 am

sorry, hon-I can't relate to the confidence thing. not like me to not speak my mind to anyone. I may choose to hold my tongue for an opportune moment-but not bloody likely lol

benibluetwo 48F

2/2/2006 3:43 pm

I also do not have the confidence to just walk up to someone I am attracted to and flat out tell them how I feel. If I did then I would not have so many regrets I guess. C'est la vie.




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