Sex With a Really Tight Woman...  

bardicman 51M
7540 posts
11/13/2005 4:27 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Sex With a Really Tight Woman...

So here I am sitting in front of the computer. I was gazing longingly at straightten2002's profile when suddenly an I got an IM from non other than "Ten" herself. She said that she was browsing my profile and noticed that I was only 97 miles away from her and she was feeling rather horny and I was looking rather good. Well I asked how drunk she was and she mumbled something un-intelligible and asked me to come to her.
I did.
I drove fast.
Two hours later we are together and I have slowly undressed her and I am just blown away by her beauty. She is so warm and soft yet firm in all the right places.
She handed me the KY and told me she had to have my hard manhood right now! I lubed up really good and was trying to insert my "tab A" into her slot "B". Damn this girl is tight. I squirted more and more KY on my penis and on her beautiful tight pussy. I pushed and pushed and finally slid inside her. Damn she was so damn tight it was like shoving my cock into wood planer or an automatic sander or something. I was trying to enjoy it but the pain of the grip was almost unbearable. I kept stroking and squirting KY in the general direction but still it felt like my dick was being shredded.
It was then I woke up and realized I had fallen asleep at the computer and was dreaming. It only took 2 hours for the paramedics to get my dick out of the electric pencil sharpener.....

I am not dead yet

goddessofbitches 42M/34F

11/13/2005 5:35 pm

OMG....that was too funny. I am still laughing. I don't think anyone has dreamed about me lately...but....I hope they unplug all appliances.,...because I can get wild and


Always The Bitch

themisskrissy 57F
2302 posts
11/13/2005 11:28 pm

dammit bard, i told you to lay off the chamomile tea!!!

LTNS Mandy.. hope all is good!!!

Virtue Alone Ennobles

anchcpl4fun 41M/45F

11/14/2005 5:52 am going to wake up the family from laughing too loud....that was

MaggiesWishes 61F

11/14/2005 6:39 am

Now, Bard ... that's getting right to the "point" of things!
Talk about grinding? OUCH! Oh my stars, too painfully funny!

warm wishes ~~ Maggie

digdug41 50M

11/14/2005 9:43 am

roflmmfao oh your a funny man I will definitely be coming back here bard that was good

roaming the cyber streets of blogland

expatbrit49 64M

11/14/2005 10:16 am

PMSL, That is just too funny ~adding to my watch list~

Thank You for Your Time and Attention

goodsexpromised 54M
8 posts
11/14/2005 11:31 am

hehehehe excellent hehehe love it...

rm_luke69iner 49M
3275 posts
11/14/2005 1:59 pm


O' God I'm going to keep my paper shredder unplugged from now on to avoid any accidents.

My neighbors pets better hope I don't start sleep walking.

S'io credesse che mia risposta fosse
A persona che mai tornasse al mondo,
Questa fiamma staria senza piu scosse.
Ma perciocche giammai di questo fondo
Non torno vivo alcun, s'i'odo il vero,
Senza tema d'infamia ti rispondo

rm_sj365 57F
2414 posts
11/14/2005 2:22 pm

You're a twisted lil biscuit aintcha?

bardicman 51M

11/14/2005 3:49 pm

Mandy - I will dream about you really soon Just for you.

Maggie - Here hold my pencil

DigDug - Thanks man, You are my hero

Expat - Thanks man, Someday I will be as good as you

GoodSex - Welcome to my blog. I have seen you on the advice lines. This is much more fun and friendly

Luke - Paper Shredder..... OUCH!! Lets NOT shred the Dicuments and just say we did.. Heeere kitty kitty kitty....

SJ - Mmmm, Twisted Biscuit... That will be the name of my next band..

I am not dead yet

themisskrissy 57F
2302 posts
11/14/2005 9:44 pm

bard, did you delete my post or did all fudged fudpuckers eat it?

Virtue Alone Ennobles

bardicman 51M

11/15/2005 1:42 pm

Krissy - It seems I used the name of a popular IM in the post and everything got fudpucked for a bit.

I am not dead yet

DTand5Speed 42M/51F

11/16/2005 6:09 am


Ok, you had me going there for a minute. - DT

007sexy40plus 52F  
7603 posts
11/16/2005 11:41 am

See Bardic,thats what you get for dreaming. But you know it was true about the tight part. But if you must know, you didnt need any KY I am full of my own lube, all you needed was to be hard and strong.

Its nice to have a man with mystery in his eyes have a dream about me, but the next time get rid of that damn pencil sharpener before dreaming of inserting objects. I am only tight, not destructive.

I am the real deal! "Come Get Me!!!"

saddletrampsk 55F

11/16/2005 3:45 pm

Bardic..LMAO..thanks for the smile today sexy..

(Princess Lips)

11/16/2005 7:31 pm

adds you to the PERV list


rm_flame69boy 30M
3 posts
11/17/2005 12:27 pm

lmfao that was hilarious. you should do comedy

rm_art_persists 53M
1789 posts
11/22/2005 10:29 pm

My problem is that my member is too small to shred....

NoMisogyny4me 64M

11/28/2005 3:14 pm

So that's what you meant when you told me you were going to keep your pencil sharp!
Hey, Bard -- don't let your meat loaf! And keep in touch with yourself!

Yacki Lopez

rm_DaphneR 59F
8023 posts
12/14/2005 10:24 pm

And you point is? Oh, I see....mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, nice.

Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.

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