a day in the april snow  

babyone116 47M
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4/5/2006 12:40 pm

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4/5/2006 12:43 pm

a day in the april snow


I love new york city. I moved away ten years ago to explore america's diversity but I have found my way home without regrets. Today was the first time in 9 years I walked on 42nd street in the snow. The people where beautiful and since I do not have a cell phone, I was not bothered by interruptions from anyone for anything. Alone with my thoughts I entered the 42nd street library aimlessly looking at old pictures and watching people being given a tour. It was a great time and I was almost or should I say completely within myself until a guard asked me to check my bag. I wanted to be offended but I understood the hyper sensitivity and I followed him to the area. After listening to what I had to do and what was a seccurity concern, I decided to continue walking the downtown area and leave the warmth of the building.
Usually I notice the smells of midtown but today it was just the snow flurries and the way people walked and moved as if I was not there. And in fact I was not there. I was thinking how alone a person can be in such a large and populous place. It kind of scared me. I began to think about how to make myself visible and known to all the people I saw. Would a kind act make someone remember or take notice of me or would I need to snatch a pursue or say a few rude words loudly? For my better judgement I decided to remain alone in my thoughts of how much I love this city and how people move in and out like a maze with meaning and determination. No where on earth can so many people be doing so few things with the importance of New Yorkers. I looked up and saw the billboards and other ads. Nothing that was of any importance to me and my current state of poverty so I continued on to the subway. These new machines really piss me off, some take change and others take bills, and of course I put a dollar in the one that only takes change. But the transit workers was very nice and pretty inside the booth. Upon hearing my plight, she let go on the subway using the emergency gate and I actually saved a buck for the trouble. As I headed towards the A train underground, I notice a beautiful tall redhead young woman with black tights on a short, catholic school girl type, mini-skirt. She seemed to walking in my general direction and I hasten my pace to get closer behind her. She was about six feet tall and by her walk I could tell she was knock-kneed and probaly a ballet dancer. As we walked closer toward the A train, I saw small glimses of her face. White, plain, no make-up and she was in her early twenties. Wanting to give her a compliment I got a little closer but then my stupid brain got in the way. What if she does not like black guys? What if she is seeing someone else? Or worse what if she does not respond at all?
I got the courage to simply tell her that I thought she had nice legs but then of course that would lead to something else more revealing and less courteous.
We made our way to the A platform and just as I was about to say something to her, the E train arrived. No need to stalk her or go out of my way so I took one last look and in my mind told her to have a nice day, stay warm and that she had a nice pair of legs. I guess being away from the city for so long has made me lose the random abandonment I use to have when approaching the opposite sex. I mean I rarely cared about the response before and if it was something that did not lead to my self desires I let it roll off me like water on a duck's back. But today I was in reflection mode and all the beauty I had seen belonged in an art gallery to be viewed and admired and not to be touched or harassed. It is moments like this that I hate being in my 30's. So I got on my train and made my way home and this is where the story ends. A day in the april snow. No so bad for being home on a couple of weeks. Especially since Spring is around the corner and New Yorkers will be happy to show off what they have been hiding all winter.
babyone116
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