I Live Two Lives...  

XJackinyourBoxX 43M
115 posts
8/31/2006 7:28 pm

Last Read:
9/2/2006 10:27 am

I Live Two Lives...

I live two lives and each is messing with the other. In life number one, I'm friends with my soon-to-be ex. We talk on the phone and see each other at least once or twice a week. We were friends long before we got married and she wants to stay friends, but it's quite difficult.
Life number two is my new life, where I'm seeing someone. Two knows about one, but not vice-versa.
I'm afraid that life one is ruining life two. The divorce isn't final and she's too much a part of my life. Life two is jealous of life one. I know that life one won't last, and I'm afraid life two won't either.
I know I put myself in this situation. I should have waited to have any kind of life until the divorce was final, but I was tired of not living. I was anxious to start over.
What happens is anyone's guess. I'm just hoping for some closure...
I am not afraid to lose life number one, but how life one affects life two is really starting to affect me. I figure, eventually I'll have no life at all...

sassybelle21 33F  
13313 posts
8/31/2006 8:50 pm

If number two is a rebound, then I guess you start too serious too soon You'll do fine.

rm_goldnglory2 67F

9/1/2006 1:24 am

I agree with sassybelle21...you should wait for awhile before you think about getting serious with another woman. It's not fair to her or to you. Everyone getting out of a long term relationship needs some time to regroup and it doesn't sound like you gave yourself any time at all. I won't date a man who separated, on the verge of divorce or just divorced for those very reasons.

rm_tymeeup 49F
2 posts
9/1/2006 6:23 am

What do U want????? Do you want to loose number "two"??? Is number "two" a rebound girl, if not then what is she to U?? Is it possible to fall for a girl during a seperation without having a rebound girl prior? I've asked myself that question a lot myself. I've been that girl and I would hate for her to go through what I did.

XJackinyourBoxX replies on 9/1/2006 9:03 am:
Although I never really expected to find someone to have a relationship with, but I'm only concerned with how my choice to try to have a life prior to ending my marriage for good is affecting this wonderful person I've met.
Rebound shmebound. I enjoy all the time I spend with her. I don't care what it's called.

TurnLock 61M
577 posts
9/2/2006 9:29 am

I know of what you speak me and my future-ex are still friends, but I would never let that interfere with me having a relationship. You have to ask yourself, why is number 2 taking a backseat to the one you are divorcing? When you understand that you have resolved your problem. If you truly care for number 2, let her know that, show her that she doesn't have to compete with the ex. Only your actions will reassure her.

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