A Walking Rim Shot  

WildWon1982 35M
625 posts
4/15/2006 6:47 pm

Last Read:
4/18/2006 8:06 am

A Walking Rim Shot

Those who know me, read me, or only hear of me know that I take little seriously. My job, my family, my finances, my workouts, my ambitions, and my personal relationships. That's about it. Everything else is a joke to me. My sense of humor is my greatest asset, and aside from my eyes (they got this cool hazel/blue flash color thing going), my most appealing feature to women.

It started when I was a kid. I was the kid everyone picked on/beat up. No one told me to ignore them and not let it get to me, until it already had. It's like asking someone to wear a condom after they've already given you VD. After about 7 years of weekly ass kickings, I decided to take a new angle. When people made fun of me, so did I. If someone cracked a joke about my weight, I one-uped them with a better joke. I became my easiest target. My own words couldn't hurt me, and it eventually stopped the bullies from picking on me. Though they were dumb as stumps, they knew they had two options. They could either laugh, and agree with my joke, thus ceasing their animosity toward me, even becoming my friends, or they could feel sorry for me, and tell me not to put myself down, and they'd stop it themselves to make the example. Either way, I won.

From that moment on I've been the jokester. Everything is funny to me. Though I take things seriously, I find humor in everything, even things that sadden/inspire/anger/embarrass others. My basic philosophy is if you cannot step back and laugh, you are lost. Sometimes I offend people. I don't care. At the end of the day, they are only words, and you are responsible for your own indignation. I've been there, and I've seen the error of my own indignation, and now there is no slam that can harm me.

Why do I bring this up? And how does it relate to the title of my post? A while back, the lovely Ms. Mango suggested jokingly that I should walk around with my own drummer, playing a rimshot every time I crack a one-liner. It was a funny concept. But the odd part is, she is not the only one to have suggested it. In the last week, three of my coworkers (who do not interract with each other), have also quipped similarly. So now I'm honestly starting to look for this travling rimshot.

Where would it be? On a keychain, perhaps? I don't know. I had something similar for a while, but it was too bulky. My sister ran a charity program for two years, where she collected stuffed animals, cleaned them, and donated them to shelters for abused children. Part of this process involved sorting out toys that talked, that had electronics in them (hard to cuddle, and potentially harmful if a child hits themselves with it). Amongst these rejects was a Tickle Me Baby Big Bird. When you pressed it's tummy, it said, "That's funny, hahahahahahahahaha." My mother actually suggested that I use it in my stand-up routine, should I decide to attempt it again. Basically, if the crowd didn't laugh, I'd pull out BB and squeeze. For the rest of the act, if they didn't laugh, I'd threaten them. "Don't make me flip you the bird, people." It's the closest thing I've had to this rimshot, but obviously it's too big to carry around and use everyday.

So now the search is on. Any help would be appreciated, and lamented by the people I would surely annoy the hell out of.

NSAAddict 43F

4/16/2006 11:06 am

LOL Bill, now I'm going to be searching for a portable rimshot for ya. Humor is a great friend, wonderful protector and a source of great happiness, carry on my friend, carry on!

mangomamiCT 43F

4/17/2006 9:24 pm

I have also find that funny , smart assed people are very deep behind the humor , just my experience . I know I have my dark moments but you would never know it to talk to those that know me , they say "Oh S is so funny ".........

Anyhow I am sure we can locate a walking rimshot for you .if not, I am creative , we will make one !!!!

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