Boyfriend application (I filled and sent.. lol)  

UltmtKaos 46M
2 posts
4/15/2006 2:07 am

Last Read:
4/18/2006 4:41 pm

Boyfriend application (I filled and sent.. lol)


ABOUT YOU:
name.Salvador Ramirez-Gonzalez-PonceLopez (But you can call me Andrew)
age.58
height.4'10"

why are you applying ? Because I need a job.. er.. wait.. because I need a woman
do you like anything about me ?You are a woman
What is it that you like or dislike ?I see by your photo's you have a bit of a mustache.. in my country that is very sexy.. where else do you have body hair?

YOUR LIKES/DISLIKES:
do you like to cuddle ? Yes, I will wrap you up like a lil burrito and lick you until you fall asleep at night
do you like to playfight ? I do not play games.. if that is what you are into.. I will beat you sensless with my little martillo (hammer)
tickle fights ? I do not like pickles.. and I don't think it appropriate to fight them
do you like kisses ? No I do not like chocolate.. hahaha yes, I like to be licked
kissing? LMAO didnt you just ask this question? (grabs hammer) >SLAP<

making out ? Yes until one of us cannot breath and we pass out (note: If it is you first.. you may feel "sore" the next day)
make out in public? I suppose yes I will.. but first you must wash that area.. oh.. haha I thought you sais "pubic"
holding hands ? That's not my hand yer holding (heh-heh)
hugs ? Good lord.. what about breaths.. blinks.. and poops.. being a bit picky aint we?
Sex ??? Do I have to pay for it? Cuz I need to budget myself.. how much will it cost me?

RANDOM:
Describe yourself in one word. FUBIJAR
Do you find me attractive? Only when I'm drunk.. that's ok I have lots of Tequilla.. and yer ass is fine right now
Your favorite band? Barney and the little purple balls.. is that a band? ".. I looove you.. you love me... that banana in yer but is sooo sexy..."
If we were to hang out, with more than me and you would you:
A. Give ALL attention to me (only if it were JUST you and me.. blow up dolls count though)
B. Give some attention to me, yet include others >cough-threesome-cough<
C. Completely ignore the fact that im there. Better looking chic must be with us

What would you do if i just kissed you ? slap you.. no wait.. hit you with my martillo >whack<
Do you mind that im very busy? What? Obviously not.. you have time to come up with this dumbass survey
Would you visit me at work? Do you work at a strip bar? In that case yes.. heh
Would you make the first move? Does slipping a roofie in yer drink count as a first move?

do you eat meat, or vegetarian? I'm a vegimeatian (I eat animals that eat vegetables)
smoke ? Only when I'm on fire
drink ? Shahhhh yuppp you wanna be sexy don't you?
drugs ? drugs are bad mmm-kay

are you self conscious ? I think... therefore I am
name three things you hate ? Dumbass bitches that make guys fill out surveys.. um.. thats about it
three things you are obsessed with ? Sniffing panties and internet stalking

Become a member to create a blog