Putting the Past Behind Me  

TexasMar 45F
563 posts
2/1/2006 8:46 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Putting the Past Behind Me

I saw my ex fiancĂ© tonight night for the first time in seven months. I thought it was going to be so hard considering how our almost three year relationship ended. We were all set to get married. It was three months away from our wedding and he finally confessed to cheating on me. I actually knew he had cheated on me four months before he actually confessed to me, but I was trying to forgive him and deal with it. It was just too much for me to get over. We were fighting way too much from the moment it happened. I knew he was lying and I knew the girl he cheated on me with. I really don’t know why I put up with it for as long as I did. Call me stupid, call it love, call it whatever you want. I finally got the courage to end it. It was the hardest thing for me to do but I finally ended it last July.

Tonight, I saw him for the first time since last July. We went to dinner just as friends. He had his daughter with him and we had a nice time. He has had many, many problems with the mother of his daughter, and we just got caught up on our lives since we broke up. I thought I was going to be all sad that we broke up but all I felt was relief that we never got married. I was so happy that I did not make the mistake of getting married again.

I was so proud of myself when he asked me if we could get back together and I told him NO, I can’t go back. I told him we can be friends but nothing more. I guess the point of this blog is I feel I have grown. He hurt me so much and I learned from that. I still have so much to more healing to do but that was a HUGE step for me. I am glad I was able to walk away from him without tears and without pain. I have no regrets anymore with him.

Now my next step is to be able to enter into a relationship without fear……that is the BIG STEP!!! I will get there eventually…..

rip1374 56M

2/2/2006 5:21 am

i am happy for you

toothysmile 51M
16517 posts
2/2/2006 6:35 pm

I know you will baby......

TexasMar 45F

2/3/2006 5:54 pm


Thank you...That was a huge step for you. Thanks for reading this post...I twas more for me than anyone.....

TexasMar 45F

2/3/2006 5:56 pm


I will baby...thank you for ALWAYS being ther for me. You help me so much and I dont eve know if you realize how much. You are a great friend to me baby.

Kisses behind closed doors!!!

rm_coathanger37 49M/49F
394 posts
2/11/2006 3:31 pm

It feels good when we can sit back an see that we have grown. The fear will pass and that will feel good too.

TexasMar 45F

2/12/2006 7:15 pm


It does feel good to sit back and see that I have grown. I was really proud of myself. I am ready for that fear to past too. That has hung around since my divorce and I am ready for that to be gone as well. I will get there someday!!!

Thanks for the vote of confidence!!!


rm_coathanger1 49M
859 posts
2/13/2006 9:53 am

You're very welcome.

Come home soon.


TexasMar 45F

2/13/2006 7:01 pm


AWWWW Are you in Texas? I know I have read your profile but dont remember where you are? I am so jealous. I miss Dallas soooo much. ALL of my family is down there. I have only adopted family up here. I will be coming back home to the Dallas area in 11 years one month and 2 weeks....lol. Ok maybe not to the day but the second my daughter turns 18, I can leave this state. And I can gaurantee I will be leaving. My kids are more than welcome to join me, and anyone else that I acquire along the way but I am out of this state in 11 years.

That does sound harsh I know but I am ready to get back to my family.

I need me a Texas man to join me up here any takers?


rm_coathanger1 49M
859 posts
2/14/2006 6:48 pm

I have always wanted to see the Statue of Liberty.....

I'll go ahead and mark that day on my calendar

TexasMar 45F

2/25/2006 5:38 am


I have not even seen the Statue of Liberty...will you take me with you when you go?

Oh Yes 11 more years....and counting.

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