General Dating Rules  

Sweetgenie_girl 42F
326 posts
8/21/2005 8:29 pm

Last Read:
8/26/2006 9:26 am

General Dating Rules

I spend way too much time surfing the net. But sometimes, I come across interesting things that make me go Huh?…The following article is one of them. Believe it of not this article was written by a man. It was called General Dating Rules for women.

***Warning: The following contains bits of tasteless, old fashion, ridiculous tips. All comments are made to be laughed at and do not reflect in anyway Sweetgenie’s opinion on dating***

· Always look great, whatever your income. Gorgeous hair and some lipstick and wearing rags will still turn his head. You have the advantage, you are the woman. Look your best as you could meet a potential Mr. Right anywhere at any time. ‒ You mean I don’t actually have to be smart, witty, funny, charming and well spoken to win a man. Damn all those books I read.

· Never reveal information you don't have to. An enigmatic woman drives men wild. ‒ One time, at the all-girl camp, some girls and me got pretty drunk. Then it was really hot and humid and our flannel see-through pajamas got sticky so we start to remove them, then Tracy, the bisexual, decided we should play this game where…oops, too much information!

· Keep dates brief but your men interested. Less is always more. ‒
Her: Well, thank you for the lovely evening but I should get going.
Him: But you just got here.
Her: Time flies when you’re having fun, huh?
Him: No seriously, you got here at 7 and it’s 7:17
Her: Well in any case, it was nice seeing you, gotta go. Next time, remind me to tell you what I got pierced recently. And call me sometimes!

· Try and stay in shape and involve some fitness regime at a gym. Watch your diet. However much you hate it, your Mr. Right loves your body as much as your mind. ‒ Again, you mean I don’t actually have to be smart, witty, funny, charming and well spoken to win a man. Damn all those books I read.

· Let your man pay. If he is interested, he is interested enough to ensure you eat well and get home safely in a cab. ‒ Which is a whole lot of nothing, since according to the previous rule, I’m not allowed to eat anymore! And shouldn’t I be walking home, to burn the calorie from the glass of water he paid for.

· Ensure you receive flowers, if he doesn't know a florist, dump him. ‒ How do you tell a guy you’re dumping him cus he doesn’t know a florist? Wait a minute, can he dump me because I don’t a personal trainer, dietician, beautician or plastic surgeon?

· Never ever sleep with a guy until he has fallen for you. Sex early in your dating game plan will ruin everything. ‒ But what if he knows a florist, then can I sleep with him?

· Always keep a guy waiting and never turn up early. It is a lady's perogative. ‒ Ok, I must admit, this one I do without even trying! (sorry guys)

· Never be available when he wants you to be. Never be at the end of a phone when he calls and always let him leave a message or two first before replying. ‒ Humm, ok, I’m confused. So when can we actually talk?

· If he is available Tuesday, you are available Thursday. ‒ Ok, so if I get this right, we can’t date Tuesdays, Thursdays or any other day of the week that we’re both available? Or is it unavailable?!?

· Weekend shopping trips with girlfriends are sacred and not available for dates. ‒ I hate shopping and I don’t have girlfriends, so now what?

· Keep your man standing on quicksand by shifting landmarks and goalposts constantly. ‒ I’m sorry, what?!?

· Ensure you are a good kisser. Men will walk away if you cannot kiss. Practice on a mirror if you have to. ‒ Ok, so I finally stopped laughing long enough to comment: who wrote this crap!?!?!

· If any man shows the slightest signs of possessiveness or insecurity run like the wind. Life is too short for boys. ‒ Finally something I agree with.

· If his shoes or hygiene are a disgrace dump him. ‒ But what if he knows a florist then, can I keep him?

· Never ever come across as too available or too desperate, he will run a mile. He is the one doing the chasing remember. ‒ Is this where that Tuesday, Thursday thingy comes in effect?

· If the guy in the corner is gorgeous go and get him and create the need in him for you. Never wait for men to come to you because you may watch him leave with someone else. ‒ Humm, again, I’m confused, I thought HE was doing the chasing.

· Never ever criticize his mother unless you want to remain single.The evil, conniving, scheming, manipulative, bit-…

alex_200mm 58M
4960 posts
8/24/2005 4:20 pm

Great commentary, but... um... flannel see-through pyjamas?

Those would be very interesting...

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