The Way its Supposed 2 be  

SweetWetSpot4U 47F
33 posts
2/7/2006 11:40 am

Last Read:
7/3/2006 12:38 am

The Way its Supposed 2 be

Well it must be that time of year, My birthday, it always happens right around then. My life messes with me, throws me a curve ball, jumps off the deep end & forces me to make to step back reevaluate where I am at, where am I headed, & start organizing & planning things.
Every year that I have done this its always been on my own, planning only for me, never figured anyone else into the equation, even when I was married I couldnt count on him , never knew if he was going to be there for me or not.
This time around is different I am trusting in that, for once in my life. I have more than just me to think about when I organize my thoughts reset my perogitives & make choices in my life, I am not alone. Its a great feeling, but very scary too, if I make choices based on just me & what I know I can take on in life & know my capabilities, at least then I will know when all is said & one when its all worked out the way i wanted it too or not, well it was all me, no one else was responsible for if it turned out good or bad I take full resposibility.
Not this time I am making descisions based on everything I know I can handle & control & more, another in my life. When I pick up the pieces & put things back together, make plans, reorginize, prioritze, I am factoring in 2 people, where I go, what I do all of, I am including a new addition to my life, my love.
I said I was going to step out of my box more, take more leaps of faith, trust more, believe more, & love more, so what better way to do that than to take the bad curve ball life thows me & see it as an opportunity to make it a homerun right?
Worst that can happen is what? I end up right back where I am at this moment or even worse, where I was before I met him?, which in all reality wasnt a horrible place, I was happy having fun liking myself very much, was just an empty hollow place there is all.
I guess this cant be all bad, stepping out, leaping trusting in my self that no matter what it will all turn out the way its supposed to be, & just Might Make Me Believe.....

rm_inkycap 43M

2/8/2006 1:12 pm

Hope you get what you want for your birthday, even if you have to plan and execute it yourself.

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