Being yourself  

rm_SexyBBW382 52F
2862 posts
8/29/2006 10:15 am

Last Read:
8/31/2006 7:07 pm

Being yourself

One thing I have found out about people is they are always worried, or can't be themselves. Are the afraid of not being accepted? One thing is very true being yourself is very important. I know when I met someone I want to know the real person they are, not the person they feel I want them to be. Eventually the real you comes out, and if you have not been honest from the start how could anything ever hope to work out for you. I feel if someone doesn't like me for who I really am, it is their loss...............Lori

rm_SexyBBW382 52F
2224 posts
8/30/2006 4:02 pm

I don't understand why you need to trust before you can be yourself, isn't it fair to the person you are with to see the real you before they get attached to the person you are trying to be. Just my thinking sorry if you don't agree...................Lori

rm_RD_RX_4U2 63M
7 posts
8/31/2006 5:21 am

I think much of it comes with time, maturity (for lack of a better word) and "little successes". Each of us has the ability to be "ourselves" or put in other words "true to ourselves", but we are taught by our society not to be. However, as each of us succeeds in some aspect of our lives, be it work, play or relationships, we gain the confidence to be ourselves more and more.

Perhaps we should learn by this and teach those we love to be honest and true from the start.

I am far from perfect, I have made many mistakes in my life and have done some things that I may not be proud of, but there are many time sin my life I have done the right thing and been true to myself. I believe that most pf use could make the same statement. Which makes me think; that sometimes; we look at things backward and are too hard on ourselves.

I ask my students these questions often. I'll share the questions here, take each by them selves and then take them as a group and see what you come up with.

1st series
1) Have you ever tried something new, a sport or a hobby?
2) Were you good at it when you first started?
3) Did you quit at your first difficulty, or did you keep trying?
4) Did you get better each time you tried?
5) What is another word for trying again and again? - Practice
6) Doesn't everything in life require practice (referring back to the first question)?

2nd series
1) Why is it easier to remember all of your mistakes and failures than your successes?
2) What is the feeling of success?
3) What is the difference between a failure/mistake and a success?
4) In the end, who has been the person who as been through all of your successes, failures and all that falls in between.

If we trust ourselves to be willing to keep trying, then we learn to believe in ourselves. If we begin to believe in ourselves we accept the fact that we can’t be everything to everybody (because at that point we would be psychotic) and we can’t please everybody (which is not our job) and we can’t please anyone person all of the time (because then we wouldn’t be being ourselves).

So the secret is to accept these 10 realities
1) It is ok to “fail” sometimes
2) It is ok to practice
3) It is ok to meet your own needs
4) It is ok to say “No” to someone
5) It is ok for someone to say “No” to us
6) It is ok to be sad
7) It is ok to be happy
It is ok to have a bad day once in a while
9) It is ok to use a success in one aspect of our lives to help bolster an attempt to “practice” another aspect of our lives
10)It is ok to be true to yourself and be yourself

Anyway, I guess you have heard enough. I hope that I have made a few points that make sense. If not, it is ok, because I trust myself enough to know that I can’t give all answers to everyone. And even some times can’t give any answers.

Then there is always reality #11

11)It is ok for you to think RD is crazy (if that’s what you want).


rm_SexyBBW382 52F
2224 posts
8/31/2006 7:06 pm

Thanks RD I totally enjoyed reading this. Thanks you very much for posting this on my blog..........................Lori

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