Slippy Jo's Happy Place  

Seriously_Real 49M
1458 posts
5/22/2006 2:29 pm

Last Read:
6/22/2006 9:38 pm

Slippy Jo's Happy Place

My friend Slippy Jo was having a hard day. It seemed as if she was under attack by The Stupid. They are everywhere, you know. The Stupid travel in packs, and infiltrate our most hallowed and necessary of institutions -- customer service lines, checkout counters, gas stations -- when you need them the most, The Stupid attack and thwart you.

Slippy's Seige, as the attack of The Stupid today will forever be known, caused her to go to her happy place. So I asked her?

What's in your happy place?

"Penguins," she said.

"What are they doing?" I asked.

"Nothing. They just stand around. And also turtles. I love turtles."

"Where are they, these standing about penguins and turtles?"

"Oh, the turtles don't stand around. They lay around in piles."

"I like the idea of piles."

"But they also waddle. They're so cute when they waddle."

"The penguins-"

"Penguins, right."

"Like little pregnant women in tuxedoes."

"You've seen them?"

"Little pregnant lesbian penguins going to a formal."

"Yes, that's right, only the lipstick kind. Bright pink lipstick."

"Then I suppose the piles of turtles are really old queens like back in Greenwich Village in the 80s, hooked on smack and having orgies."

"Precisely. Only they're transvestites."

"Oh, I'm so gonna blog this!"

And here I am.

Imagine a world without male penguins, except for breeding purposes, where the polar ice caps don't melt and the fish are as plentiful as k.d. lang and Melissa Etheridge CDs, where you can dive in the water and keep that lipstick fresh, lush and kissable. And they're all going to prom.

Imagine a world where the sun shines, where you can be here, and queer, and everyone is used to it. Where you can lay around in piles, moving slowly, with no care in the world except whether your leather bustier is too snug, where --

"Ahem! But there has to be a swimming pool. And a slide."

Imagine a world populated by prom-bound pregnant penguins with pink lipstick slide effortlessly into an azure liquid paradise, sunning themselves as they waddle past the almost imperceptibly moving pile of boa-clad turtles. You can hear the sounds of the soundtrack to Moulin Rouge softly playing in the background, complemented by the mellifluous musings of Aimee Mann at Lilith Faire. There is a splash, some giggling from the pile, and then movement -- green movement of legs and hands and thigh-high boots --and the pile slowly creeps to water's edge, where the transvestite turtles dive in and join the frolicky fun...

This is Slippy Jo's Happy Place.

What's in yours?

--Seriously (wondering if his muse has been drinking again)

rm_corezon 54F
3376 posts
5/22/2006 2:35 pm

One vote cast that the muse has been drinking again

Seriously_Real replies on 5/25/2006 4:53 am:
She's a ho, that muse.

PurplePeach72 45F  
9199 posts
5/22/2006 2:37 pm

What's in my happy place? humm well depends on what I'm escaping from. For example, I would normally say horses, hot men, parrots, dogs, but if I'm pissed at my horse, my dog, the bird, one of the hot men in my life (certainly would never be pissed at my hubby..hehe), then I improvise. It's good to let your muse take a drink, smoke, whatever their habit of choice is, gets those creative juices flowing. From legal briefs, to lesbian penquins-are you sure it's just drinking your muse is doing?
{=} LeeAnn


Seriously_Real replies on 5/25/2006 4:53 am:
My muse is a prankster. I can't do anything about it. And she has an affinity for psychadelic funguses....

rm_1hotwahine 64F
21091 posts
5/22/2006 2:54 pm

The Emerald City, of course. Only with a balloon that works. And people from Kansas can visit anytime I want them to visit.

And Daphne, er, I mean Glinda bubbles over from Munchkinland whenever she wants.

Wanna be the Lion?

Yeah, I'm still [blog 1hotwahine]

Seriously_Real replies on 5/25/2006 4:55 am:

rm_1hotwahine 64F
21091 posts
5/22/2006 2:57 pm

PS: If you'd launched into a chorus of "Raindrops and roses and whiskers on kittens" I would've been outta here in a flash.

Yeah, I'm still [blog 1hotwahine]

Seriously_Real replies on 5/25/2006 4:55 am:
Brown paper packages tied up with string....

GoddessOfTheDawn 106F
11240 posts
5/22/2006 3:16 pm

just drinking for that muse? you sure?

should I get one I'll tell ya

Seriously_Real replies on 5/25/2006 4:55 am:
You don't need a muse. You're a goddess. Dammit.

rm_sj365 56F
2414 posts
5/22/2006 3:24 pm

i LOVE this...its perfect...cept in my happy penguin place the penguins would never be going to prom (gag). more likely they would be anarchist penguins on pink lipstick.

SJ who might just be Slippy Jo

Seriously_Real replies on 5/25/2006 4:56 am:
Cool. Anarchist penguins on holiday! Perfecter and perfecter. They're actually pregnant Goth lesbian penguins with pink lipstick. Excellent.

love you, SJ

PrincessKarma 44F
6188 posts
5/22/2006 3:34 pm

Drinking? More like ingesting magic mushrooms...

The Big Bang was the mother of all orgasms.PrincessKarma

Seriously_Real replies on 5/25/2006 4:57 am:
Que? I don't know what you're talking about...

Knot4Everyone 41F

5/22/2006 5:56 pm

Wow! My happy place isn't nearly as elaborate as that! How about a nice lil' sitting spot on the edge of a small river deep in the woods, with the sun just beginning to peak over the tree tops and all the woodland creatures stirring about? With the fish hopping in the water and the turtles sunbathing on downed trees, all lined up in order of size... That's my happy place.

Seriously_Real replies on 5/25/2006 4:57 am:
Okay, the turtles all being lined up in order of size thing is kinda freaking me out a little....Quick! Someone! Help me analyze what that means!

absolutelynormal 57F
6563 posts
5/22/2006 7:05 pm

My happy place exists IRL and in my mind too. My happy place is when my kids are home. I'm in some other room in the house. I can't see them, I can only hear them. They both have distinctive laughs. I suppose they are (the laughs) much like the cry of an infant to it's mother, know it anywhere. I hear them laughing and giggling, sitting on the couch perhaps looking at some inane website my son has found.

Seriously_Real replies on 5/25/2006 4:58 am:
That's a warm happy place for me, too. (Only my girls. Not your boys. That would be creepy. Heh.)

JustaSeeker 107F

5/22/2006 7:20 pm

Sounds like a weekend in Amsterdam to me.

Seriously_Real replies on 5/25/2006 4:58 am:
Or just another day at Elbman's house while he's away.

earthShiva 60M

5/22/2006 7:42 pm

Happy place is a grey mist with no soundtracks in the background.

I'm back in RI. Sensory overload happening... Too much traffic. Must break free...

Seriously_Real replies on 5/25/2006 4:58 am:
Go. Get out. Clear the mind....

chasingfun27 39M
1108 posts
5/22/2006 10:21 pm

Stinking penguins have been invading my dreams quite regularly, due to a recent penguin-related incident. So thanks, now I can look forward to the little fuckers wearing lipstick. As if I'm not messed up enough already!

Seriously_Real replies on 5/25/2006 4:59 am:
hey, don't blame me. It was Slippy's fault.

rm_gerson42 53M
2419 posts
5/22/2006 10:41 pm

You know, this penguin and turtle thing may effect your ratings. lol

Seriously_Real replies on 5/25/2006 5:00 am:
I don't care about ratings, Ger. Not much. I have never been good at whoring. (At least not when I was the whore.)

curious082385 32F
4925 posts
5/23/2006 3:41 am

Ah ha!! The away message makes sense now!!

My happy place isn't quite as detailed as that, but there is a spot on the cliffs above my house. First off, if you are going there because you are the time to get too the top, you are too tired from the climb to be very angry. Second, there is a great view out over my valley.
If I get upset while away from home, all I have to do is imagine myself up there.

Seriously_Real replies on 5/25/2006 5:00 am:
That's a great place for a happy place. Wonderful that it could be in an actual place.

rm_LilBlondeNZ 41F
1028 posts
5/26/2006 4:24 pm

I think everyone knows where my happy place is... and who is with me.


Seriously_Real replies on 5/27/2006 11:15 am:
That's the happiest place of all. Good for you, hon.

Become a member to create a blog