Open is sometimes closed...  

Senseyoualize 53M
13 posts
3/24/2006 9:40 pm
Open is sometimes closed...

Had an interesting experience tonight - happens every now and then when one is in an open marriage like mine. I went out to an open mic tonight and there was a woman playing there who was so keenly beautiful to me that I sat enraptured by her playing, and her smile. I suspect most people out there figure that since I'm in an open marriage, I get to be a "playa" for any woman I am attracted to - but nothing is further from the truth. Face it, I'm still married - and just because I have the okay to play from my wife, doesn't mean I have the okay from myself to be a slime mold and try to make it with every woman I find attractive.

I mean, think about it - I could just pretend I'm not married and come-on to her...but then would have to eventually let the cat out of the bag (slime mold). Or I could casually mention I'm in an open marriage and I think she's attractive (slime mold for a good 98% of the women in the world...if they even understood what I meant by "open marriage" in the first place).

So I actually wrote in my ever-present writer's diary..."I will do her a favor and leave her alone." Yes, she affected me extremely strongly (surprisingly so) - but as she is likely running her life via the rules of society, there is no future in any kind of relationship with me. One has to be running off the rails of soceity in order to see that there is a different kind of future with a guy in my position. Its just not marriage and kids and a mortgage. Its a strange mixture of freedom and commitment.

Thus, here I am on AdultFriendFinder where I can front-load the whole situation and put all my cards on the table.

I want to thank the folks who have responded so far to my post about sensuality. I'm really jazzed to hear others have experienced the same thing. More power to the sensualists!!

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