This one is not original  

RockPebble 70M
1039 posts
9/8/2006 10:58 am

Last Read:
9/19/2006 1:52 pm

This one is not original


I received this in an email from a friend but I liked it so much I had to pass it on.

This is an actual job application that a 75 year old senior citizen submitted to Wal-Mart in Arkansas. They hired him because he was so funny.

NAME: George Martin

SEX: Not lately, but I am looking for the right woman (or at least, one who'll cooperate).

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

PREVIOUS SALARY: A lot less than I'm worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK: Any.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p. m. Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 lbs.?: Of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be, "Do you have a car that runs?"

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes, so they tell me.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job - no, on my breaks - no.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde supermodel who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now.

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Oh yes, absolutely.

SIGN HERE: Sagittarius

sexymermaid6956 64F
26393 posts
9/8/2006 11:49 am

lol too funny Rock..I loved it...i needed a chuckle and you come thorough for me...

[]

Seduce my mind and my body


RockPebble 70M
2493 posts
9/8/2006 12:53 pm

    Quoting sexymermaid6956:
    lol too funny Rock..I loved it...i needed a chuckle and you come thorough for me...
Glad I could help.


ohsodelicious 58F
1922 posts
9/14/2006 8:25 am

My pebble...It is amazing what we can get away with with age...Thanks for the laugh

grinning...OhSo{=}


RockPebble 70M
2493 posts
9/14/2006 1:20 pm

    Quoting ohsodelicious:
    My pebble...It is amazing what we can get away with with age...Thanks for the laugh

    grinning...OhSo{=}
I intend to use him for my inspiration in a few years, lol.


ohsodelicious 58F
1922 posts
9/14/2006 10:32 pm

Rock...I'm sure you will

grinning...OhSo{=}


RockPebble 70M
2493 posts
9/15/2006 7:02 am

Thanks...


RockPebble 70M
2493 posts
9/19/2006 1:52 pm

Happy you enjoyed it. I think he has become my idol, lol.


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