Friendship in the lifestyle  

Rick57706 45M
12 posts
10/6/2005 4:37 am

Last Read:
4/14/2006 12:04 pm

Friendship in the lifestyle

Freiendships or just sex? If you take a look at a great number of the ads on AdultFriendFinder, you could ALMOST break them down into two categories. Those that are looking for a friendship along with the sexual activities and those that are just looking for a sex (or a fuck). It is interesting to me because the first looks to be the "good choice" while the second seems to carry a negative connotation. Is it really that simple though? I think that within both of those choices can lie elements of the other. Yes we have lifestyle friends who are also fairly active in our "straight" life. But we also have lifestyle friends who we ONLY go to strip clubs with, ONLY play strip poker with, and ONLY are involved with when we are feeling a little frisky lol! Is that true friendship or something less? And what if you happen to see the person that you mutually agreed that it is just "a sex thing?" If you have a converstation in public, meet up for drinks somewhere, or share a dance at a club, have you become friends or are just being friendly. Things that make you go hmmm

bigfurrybear 43M

10/6/2005 7:19 am

One of my "friends" that I initially met on here as a sex only relationship has actually grown into one of the best friendships I have ever known. If we see each other in public we still play ignorant, for both my discretion and hers, but we talk on the phone almost daily and IM all the time. We talk about life, kids, work, school, whatever and I really cherish her friendship.

However, it is still very understood that ultimately our relationship is what it is and will not become a romantic thing. We both understand that very clearly.

I also have others that are just the typical fuck buddies. If that is all they want than I am happy to oblige. My relationship with a person depends on the person. I just play it by ear and go with the flow I guess.

dream_away77 41F

11/30/2005 9:57 am

I think that it can be considered that simple, depending each individual person. For my situation, I feel more comfortable with people that I meet and become friends with. One reason is the discreet relationship. If two of you are married, then you both have a lot to loose if something was to go sour down the road. Reason two, you seem to be more relaxed and at ease knowing the person you are with and being able to carry on a conversation beyond, lets get naked and fuck, makes it more worth while. Also, I like developing those friendships first because you learn to trust them more and you know that if you ever needed to just talk to them about nothing at all or something that is really bothering you, then you know that they would not judge you but actually be there for you as a friend.

Don't get me wrong, it is nice to have an occasional sex buddy around,but all in all I would prefer to have a friendship with someone. Yes, sometimes it can turn into that person loving you in their own way, but rest assured that person needs to understand what the relationship is and accept it or change their lifestyle.

bobber8 60M

1/31/2006 12:22 pm

This is your best post Dream. Trust is first and formost!

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