Just a few thoughts...  

NaughtyNurseMn 50F
212 posts
1/17/2006 8:46 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Just a few thoughts...

How is it that one day, I can be talking to the ex, all is well- life is good. We are being totally civil, cool and laughing. Even reminiscing about the past and what went wrong, but not bitterly. Talking about dating again and what we are both looking for, wanting. I am thinking this guy will be such a great catch for some lucky lady!

The next day... TODAY, I am completely FUMED by every word that comes out of his mouth! He is such a jerk. I am wondering how did I EVER love this man? Why is he such a total dick!? Why is he so negative all the time, how did I ever handle this for so many years!? "I HATE YOU!"

We were talking on the phone, I sent him some pics from our Mexican vacation. Asked him if he got them, stated he hadn't had a chance to see them yet. He pulled them up on his computer while I was talking to him and made the following comments:

1.) Why did you send it to both of my email accounts? Your clogging up two accounts now.

2.) The kids look burned in the pics...
"Ohhh, their faces are sooo red! They look sore!"

3.) The oldest was home sick today. She came down with the same upper respiratory bug that I've had for two weeks. Yesterday, she wanted to go to her friends, but since I was working- I couldn't give her a ride. She was so desperate to go, she asked if she could walk. I consented. The ex agreed to pick her up after he was done with work. Today, he wanted to know why I let her walk all the way to her friends house yesterday when she was sick, then stated it was a good thing he was able to pick her up. First of all, she wasn't sick when she left. It was 36 degrees out yesterday and she begged me to go, it isn't really that far maybe a 1/2 mile. Because she is sick today.... it is all my fault. However, he see's no correlation in the fact that while we were in Mexico she and I slept in the same king sized bed and I was very sick and she likely caught it from me!

4.) He went into the kids playroom while we were gone and said it was a total disgrace and that he was disgusted by it. HELLO!! IT IS A KIDS PLAYROOM! It used to be his office, to clear out the living room for carpet cleaners, I threw the kids toys in there and shut the door.

5.) No thank you at all for anything. No thanks for sharing the pics of my kids with me. Just tons of little negative sideways comments.

6.) He said that he was behind in getting things done because he had to take care of the dogs when I was gone. By the way, I paid him two hundred dollars to do it and my friend did it the first 3 days because he was gone on a business trip! How does letting the dogs out three times a day take that much time that you don't have time to spend with your kids!?

7.) The only time he sees the kids right now is when I ask him to. He doesn't volunteer, ask or want to see them. It is so sad. It pisses me off. Right now he isn't able to take them over night or for a wkd because he doesn't have any place for them to stay until he finds a new place in the spring- great excuse! He wasn't excited to see them when we got home, in fact, I offered for him to spend time with them!

When I mentioned this to him, that it seemed like everything that came out of his mouth was negative, he hung up on me!! GRRRrrrr

I am so fed up today. I hate him, I am soooo glad this divorce is nearly completed. It inspired me to call my lawyer to figure out what the hold up is! I am always trying to be nice to him. Trying to be his friend. I still "love" him and want us to continue to be friends, but it is clear the more that I try the more that he helps me realize why this divorce is SO RIGHT! I am a really positive person and it is a wonder why and how I ever made it through so long with him. I guess I knew that was how he was, but didn't let it bother me. The more and more he would comment, the more and more it started to bring me down. I can't let him get to me. But, he does.

Sorry... some days your the bird flying high, some days your the statue in the park getting shit on by the bird flying high! Today, I feel like the statue!

The Naughtiest Nurse You'll Ever Know...


piamatter 45F

1/17/2006 9:30 pm

God I ve been there. It sounds like my husband (currently married wishing i wasnt). I am sure you could use a break and a little time away from the kids to enjoy the quiet. Glad you had a place to vent.


im_curious_4u 51M

1/17/2006 10:00 pm

This sounds very similar to what a friend of mine goes through on occasion. Her ex does the same thing from time to time. He gets his, as she calls it, his pissy pants on and bitches about the dumbest things. I suppose some of it is jealousy.

aascrompn 43M
6444 posts
1/18/2006 8:29 am

People break up for reasons that never really go away. It's never advised to go back to one you've ended things with. You're doing the right thing.

Fallic40 54M
1858 posts
1/20/2006 10:13 am

it sounds like he was jealous becuase you and the kids got to go and have some fun .... and he didn't.

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