Is There Something Wrong With A Sexually Free Spirited Woman???  

NaughtyKittyII 46F
535 posts
2/19/2005 11:59 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Is There Something Wrong With A Sexually Free Spirited Woman???

I'm currently faced with a dilemma...and am now reaching out to my fellow AFFers for a little input. Two part question...the other is below.

Question: How many men are intimidated by a sexually free-spirited and uninhibited woman???

What I've discovered personally, firsthand is that most are...maybe some won't admit it...but I truly believe a few of them get a little nervous when dealing with a woman of said nature. I think that this is true especially in cases where a man has been mistreated in a previous relationship and then TRUST becomes a major issue.

In my own opinion, I believe if a man was geniunely secure with himself...when involved in ANY type of relationship...(i.e. boyfriend/girlfriend, attached, married and so on). With the exception at times, leaving room for "Fuck Buddies" who again, in my opinion don't necessary fit into this category due to the more laid back and open nature of this sort of relationship. Though, when involved with someone exclusively in this could indeed here too arise and become an issue. So, if a man is indeed secure and confident enough in himself and his situation, being involved with a woman of such a free nature, he should have no problems with coping with the following:

1)HER having a few male friends (and mind you, only a FEW...possibly only "chat buddies")...helps to keep down the DRAMA.

2)Participating in adult "group" activities would be "like butter" for HIM. Or if they even "flew solo" occassionally...having a mutual agreement between themselves..that "what is good for the goose is indeed good for the gander" also. If they allow each other this type of freedom...things should be GRAVY!!! As long as no one is left in the dark about what is REALLY GOING ON.

3)He'd ooze confidence in knowing that regardless of what they do TOGETHER...which is the operative word here-that SHE will still be going home with HIM.

And 4)...which is truly #1 but I've saved the best for last...TRUST!!!

HE most certainly has to be able to TRUST HER...wholeheartedly...and believe in the fact that SHE is indeed with HIM. The "others" are simply another form of adult entertainment and enjoyment...recreation if I may...LOL And not bring any of his old emotional baggage along for the ride with him...

HE also must know that no one can do ANYTHING to HER unless SHE ALLOWS IT!!! Faith and Trust...two very tricky things...

I'd truly love to hear what you all have to say about this matter. Men and Women alike.

Question: Truthfully, do these types of women scare men off??? Or do men honestly want THEIR women or significant others to remain DOCILE...NON-EXPERIMENTAL...turned OFF instead of ON by any or some forms of uncommon sexual perversions and/or acts, which by society are deemed "not natural or normal" (i.e. anal, bondage, roleplaying, fetishes)???

So...feel free...go away...I'll be waiting and will try to add replies to all whose responses spark my attention.

'Til Then...Kisses XOXO


TitMonkey1979 39M
10 posts
2/19/2005 6:26 pm

I myself fantasize about women like that but i think like most guys out there...its just fantasy. When that fantasy arises, most may not know how to handle it lol

bottombitch67 51F

2/20/2005 3:51 pm

It's actually called 'emotional maturity'... most people (both male and female) are insecure with sharing their respective person with someone else for fear that they will be losing something instead of focusing on what they both should be gaining. Going through an experience like that can really bring a couple closer together if they communicate FULLY what the are feeling and what they should expect. (this is actually from the male in this couple...)

satisfaction046 72M
3 posts
2/22/2005 4:40 am

I'm a male that loves a sexualy liberated woman, I know that the sex we have together is "special" and the sex that we experience with others is satisfying and good , but still a suplement to what we already have . we have played together as well as one on one with others, we have also watched each other with other partners. it's a turn on for us to see each other enjoy are sexuality with others

5 posts
2/22/2005 6:57 am

Well first of all if I was nervous ????? I would not have joined aaf.... I think you are a great lady and very honest as am I .....

redswallow777 49M
6811 posts
2/22/2005 7:00 am

I would like to think that I could handle it if my spouse or significant other was an uninhibited, free spirited woman. I think many men would have trouble with the situation though. They would see a woman at a strip joint as hot...they might even imagine or desire their spouse to be as hot....but to acually have her take a job there would be totally out of the question. They want thier wives to be angels in real life even if they secretly wish they were hot little devils in bed.

redswallow777 49M
6811 posts
2/26/2005 6:07 am

Naughty, I was expressing above, the way I felt most men might see a sexually free woman not how I feel. I was confirming what you put into words in your initial comments.

It would be a sham if my wife and I professed to be in an open marriage and then said we could not have relationships outside the marriage, sexual or otherwise. I trust my wife totally. That is the core of an open relationship.

That said, it would be nice if each relationship had two iindividuals as open to experimentation. I am, but my wife isn't. I like to learn all I can about the subject; she has other pots on the stove that are more important to her.. And this does not mean she has not been sexual outside of our marriage.

Earlier on in our relationship she had a very good friend who was going thru some hard times. I mean he was really struggling with some emotional baggage and my wife had sex with him thinking she could help him get thru it. It was a spontanious reaction on her part to his need. She judged the situation as safe, that it would not cause anyone harm, and she went for it.

She was not doing it out of some need to be sexually free in this experiment. She was doing it out of a need to take care of someone. This is the wonderful thing about my wife...her caring. Now again, don't take me wrong. If she had come home and said, "Ray, I just made love to woman because I always wanted to try that," I would have had the same reaction I had that day. I would have been happy for her. In the end it comes down to what you I trust her.

It is not, simply put, just what I want as a man. It is also what she wants. She has little desire for sexual experimentation. I can bring in new things to the relationship and she will try them most of the time, but she has no desire to do the exploration needed to do it herself. And that's OK. We are two different persons, with two different sets of needs and desires. That is what is exciting. We each go out into the world each day and bring back experiences that make our personal lives fuller and our relationship fuller. Yes, we both reap the benefits of an open relationship. The worst thing I could imagine in a relationship for me, is one that is closed to outside experiences, outside relationships.

Whew...sorry for going on so. It's just that it's so close to what I truly believe. I would really hope that you could find that person that is truly trustful of you...that feels the same way you do about sex. He would be a real treasure.

redswallow777 49M
6811 posts
2/28/2005 1:44 pm

Just checking back to see if you had responded.

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