You Want A 'What'?  

MrNuttz05 50M
1845 posts
4/23/2006 7:01 am

Last Read:
5/10/2006 5:50 pm

You Want A 'What'?

It was a pretty decent day here in Detroit a few days ago, mid 70's, a heatwave for this time of year in these parts... So I get my daughter loaded up in the Nuttmobile & off to the Dairy Queen we go. A banana split? Hot fudge sundae? Whatever it was going to be it had to have NUTTZ on top My own way of paying tribute to myself... So we pull up into the parking lot, & as usual, there is a line. So I ponder the thought of another parlor or dread the line... But all of a sudden a gorgeous Mustang convertible pulls up beside me... Black, chromed out, & shining like a new baby's ass... Nice! Then I got a look @ her! ...... Jaw drops! Whoa! She was definitely 'jack-off' material. Tall legs, smooth carmel skin, short & articulate hair style.... Oh yeah! I would do her!... And then some! I quickly put my tongue back into my mouth & decided that since we were already here that we should go get in line with the others. My daughter is excited so she takes off running. I quickly corral her & the hottie was impressed with my fatherly skills so she flashed me a hot smile... Oh those lips! I was lusting really bad... NO! I mean worse than usual... For the most part, I leave my sexual advances to the FFA site, it cuts through all of the red tape... But if this woman had any red tape it would have been in the shape of a bow & it would have been attached to her perfect ass! Never has a pair of jeans fit an ass so well... She was a cross between Jada Pinkett-Smith & J-Lo... Nuttz was losing it... She had her son with her, about my daughters age. As she danced & paraded in anticipation of her ice cream treat her counterpart just held on to his moms leg... I wanted to trade places with the lil' guy so badly! Nuttz was losing it fast... Then time stood still as she turned around & asked me;

Incredible Looking Woman; How old is she?
Nuttz; Honey, tell her how old you are?
Princess Nuttz; I'm 3...
Incredible Looking Woman; Oh... You are so adorable! What's your name?
Princess Nuttz; (Grabbing my leg)Princess Nuttz?... What's your name?
Incredible Looking Woman; Oh! My name is the Incredible Looking Woman...
Princess Nuttz; (Pointing to her son)What's his name?

As this conversation continued for a few moments it was obvious that my 3 yr. old was doing Dads' dirty work. The innocence of a child had overtaken the lust of her old man... Many of thoughts zoomed through my head as I finally focused back on reality...

Incredible Looking Woman; You have a gifted little girl.
MrNuttz; Thank you...

She smiled @ me, bit her bottom lip, & then turned away... She bit her bottom lip? Geez, you know what that means? She wants me! She wants Nuttz! It's a proven fact that if you bite your bottom lip you have the hots for someone... & since I was there!.... Now what? My daughter has sealed this deal for me, the rest should be easy, right? A soft & gentle wind blew & from that wind came the scent of her... She smelled like the wind itself, so gentle, so refreshing... Nuttz was losing it & losing it bad... The line moved up & it was the Incredible Looking Woman's turn to order;

Cashier; May I help you?
Incredible Looking Woman; Let me get two scoops of strawberry & a 'quickie'.
Cashier;?????? Two scoops of strawberry & a what?
Incredible Looking Woman; A 'quickie', you do sell 'quickies' right?
Cashier; Do you mean 'slur-pee'?
Incredible Looking Woman; (Digging in purse) What did I say?
Cashier; You said 'quickie'...
Incredible Looking Woman; OMG! Yeah! Slur-pee ...

Have you ever wanted to laugh so hard that you actually started to cry? The tears were rolling down the side of my face. And she knew it! She refused to turn back around... Throughout the whole entire time of them preparing her order NOT once did she look back... I felt her embarrassment... & the condition that I was in I had no chance of easing it for her. It's a good thing that she did not look back, because Nuttz would have lost it... & laughed uncontrollably in her face! You want a 'quickie'? No freakin' way dude...
Her order was ready & quickly she went towards her Mustang...

MrNuttz; It was nice meeting you!
Incredible Looking Lady; (Screeeeeeeeeech)
Cashier; May I help you?
MrNuttz; ^^^^Breaks out in a gut wrenching laugh^^^^....


rm_art_persists 53M
1789 posts
4/23/2006 8:51 am

you're a lucky man

MrNuttz05 replies on 4/24/2006 1:39 pm:
Yes, uncontrollable laughter is good for the soul...

EroticaXTC 51F

4/23/2006 11:54 am

That was great!!! It's a shame though, that she felt so mortified after blurting out the "wrong" thing....I can always turn it around & make the laughter work for me if it's worth it!

MrNuttz05 replies on 4/24/2006 1:41 pm:
'Mortified'... Yeah, I would say so... I think if it would have took one more second to complete her order she would have left without it! She had NO intentions on corrective actions...

waerlookin4fun 51M/47F

4/23/2006 12:06 pm

omg, lmao....your blogs crack me up!!! I have been known to say the wrong thing in public too

TheRealThing655 49F
9558 posts
4/23/2006 2:39 pm

What a great story!! Who would have thought a trip to DQ would have a story attached to it! Too funny. Yes, sometimes life does surprise us with things like that.

MrNuttz05 replies on 4/24/2006 1:44 pm:
I would be the 1st to tell you that I am a silly man! But some moments speak for themselves

spoldrtn812 52F  
1058 posts
4/23/2006 5:57 pm


Please, Sign my Guestbook Screw me

MrNuttz05 replies on 4/24/2006 1:49 pm:
I was going to address her after she got her order, at least I was thinking about it! But when that colossal mishap took place I went from suave & enticed to absolute asshole... I could NEVER let her off the hook for that one. So, she did the right thing

(What the fuck is this shit..?? *rolls eyes*)

4/23/2006 8:43 pm

Your such a Slut...god I luv it...Ready


MrNuttz05 replies on 4/24/2006 1:52 pm:
My GrandMa said, 'Sluts are born & whores are made!'

mycin62 56F

4/23/2006 9:26 pm

LMAO, you are too funny. Great post.

MrNuttz05 replies on 4/24/2006 1:54 pm:
Ah, the 'Lady In Red'... TY, just one of those moments that I wanted to share with you beautiful people in BLOGLAND...

curious082385 32F
4925 posts
4/23/2006 11:45 pm

Too funny! Gotta love those Freudian slips, huh?

MrNuttz05 replies on 4/24/2006 1:56 pm:
I think even Sigmund would have gotten a kick out of that one... You want a what?(lol) A slurpee could be said in an erotic way, right? I mean if you take it out of context. But A 'quickie' is straight to the point, huh?

firestarter665 44M/40F

4/24/2006 5:47 am

After all that she should have turned around and winked at you or something. What a great compliment for you!!

MrNuttz05 replies on 4/24/2006 2:00 pm:
The irony here, firestarter, is that we both had opportunities to right the situation. But she was too shamed to do so & I was too arrogant to do so... I mean, once I knew that she was feeling me too, the anticipation went south & the asshole in me took over... I think I was looking for an out before I even got in, thus my reason for contemplating retirement...

pet_humility 50F

4/24/2006 7:25 am

I thought that only happened
in the movies..

MrNuttz05 replies on 4/24/2006 2:04 pm:
I never told ya'? Well, it may have been in one of those post that got canned, but Nuttz will be selling his autobiography & putting it on the big screen. It will be a trilogy... My whole freakin' life is a movie. And here comes a new chapter!

methodman1000 41M
1775 posts
4/24/2006 9:59 am

funny post bro.......

MrNuttz05 replies on 4/24/2006 2:05 pm:
MM, how is my friend from the 'Mother Land'? TY, just trying to get some ice cream, that's all.... Some freakin' ice cream

Sorceror07 55M

4/24/2006 10:03 am

yeah... but did you get her phone number?

...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!...

MrNuttz05 replies on 4/24/2006 2:07 pm:
Naaaaa.... I don't think she wanted a guy calling her & breaking out in a laugh that's mindful of Moe, Larry, & Curley... I lost it! I really did....

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