On the Subject of First Encounters - Case Study #1  

Milfman17 56M
22 posts
4/15/2006 10:08 pm

Last Read:
4/23/2006 7:55 pm

On the Subject of First Encounters - Case Study #1

“Fishin’ expedition or a first date???”

Call it awkward or just plain silly, meeting someone on-line and then agreeing to meet them off-line takes chutzpah (or juevos for my “south of the border” friends). These encounters can range from disbelief (in what you have done) to outright debauchery (OMG, she’s a knockout! I think I’ll do her right here…. I’m not sure what the social scientists (or shrinks) call it, but it is one hell of a way to avoid paying a hefty fee to have your 29 dimensions of compatibility examined by a computer just to discover the same thing…but at less cost.

An intense encounter is arranged at a somewhat neutral location, say a downtown bar on a Saturday night where the lights are low, the band is blaring or some fool is up there doing a Karaoke after he’s reached his limit. No one can see you as you make the liaison, not even the ghosts who follow you on your daily rounds (Yes, its dead Aunt Emma’s turn today to make sure you don’t step knee deep in it). You’re not too apprehensive, after-all it was you who arranged this whole thing, and besides she did want to meet-up with you, but maybe it was to verify the picture you sent her, you know, the one from your last cruise in 1998 when you still had a head of hair???? Hmmm??

Never mind. You can’t get out of this one. It’s nearly 8pm and if she sees you fleeing the front door, you’ll not only look like an ass, but you’ll end up removing all doubts and fucking it up for the rest of us. You’ll have to go through with this. Yeah, I know. The picture she sent you was a tad dark, maybe a little grainy, poor light, yadda yadda yadda! Now you’re thinking “Just exactly what is it that I got myself into???” Too late to rationalize here baby. You gotta put that game face on, go in there, and make us proud! After-all, tis’ your world homey and she has expectations of you walking the talk.

Profiles be damned, if Congress passed laws against perjuring yourself on the site where you met, there’d be a ton of 3 strikes offenders…..I think somehow it cuts both ways. Your best hope is to make sure that you don’t say or do anything stupid. This in itself is a learned (skilled) behavior, oftentimes lost on many guys. But it’s your lucky day and Aunt Emma is with you…thick and thin (Note that most aunties were rather “thick”. That’s why daddy married little sister).

As she enters the place you notice a stunning beauty….”Ahh she is a blonde after-all” No it’s not the spotlight from the stage hitting her as she walks by to meet you. Your ability to size her up and measure your words (responses) to her will determine whether or not you’ll leave the establishment with her or without her……sometimes this is just a roll of the dice…remember, no “One-liners” no clich├ęs and certainly don’t talk about her ex-boyfriend, politics or any recent encounters on your part. She knows 110% (+/-10 percent) that all you’d like to do is have some of that “stuff” and it is her job to make sure you “earn” it. “Earning” it here means successfully completing the mental checklist of items that she has about her “ideal” guy. Say one stupid thing and the checklist is shredded and suddenly you’ll find yourself hearing “Well, it’s getting late and I have a Yoga class in the morning…See ya!” (Note: Yoga classes and blow jobs have certain similarities; they are not often conducted on Sunday mornings).

She introduces herself as “Miranda”. Now isn’t that just a fucking stellar name. Mom must have been watching another re-run of Star Trek when she came up with that one. But you’ve elected to let her talk about her. This is a decent strategy for a guy who has a lot to say but really wouldn’t be saying anything, especially given your propensity to comment about things where you have little or no insights (unless you subscribe to Vanity Fair, People and US magazines. And if you do, you should be meeting a sensitive guy yourself). Should you survive this event, you’ll reach the next step in the evolutionary process of getting laid. For heaven’s sake, let them have their say, nod your head and show the following:

1. Empathy
2. Understanding
3. Caring (remembering to not be judgmental)
4. Compassion

Yes I know, this takes some work. You have to remember that this is where the bar is set and if you are to successfully complete that mental checklist, you have negotiate the mental mine field.

As far as drinks are concerned, she may or may not want to pay for her own. Always offer, and don’t comment (remember to just shut the fuck up and don’t make an issue of anything). Maintaining your mystique and not tipping your hand is one of the “48 Laws of Power”. Don’t transgress. But again, it is your lucky day and you are buying her that Rum & Coke, Screwdriver or fancy Amaretto drink (or was it a Mudslide???) and the issue is moot (or “Mute” for you ignorant, uneducated bastards). A few drinks into this and she’s decided to let you take her dancing to a swanky South of Market (downtown San Francisco) spot. You have arrived at what we call “Stage 2” acceptance, where she’ll let you pay the $20 cover, get her wasted and meet up with her “real friends”….stay tuned, you’ll likely be buying Tiffany, Debbie and Miranda drinks till 4am you lucky son-of-a-bitch! Couldn’t happen to a nicer guy! Ahh go do it, after-all it’s just paper money! They print that shit out in rolls down the street at the Federal Reserve.

So the even progresses to the swanky spot where you and Tiffany hit it off better than you did with Miranda. Aunt Emmy is getting tired, even for a ghost. Auntie is sending vibes to the kids telling them its time to go…Somehow you find yourself making the rounds with the women in a Yellow cab, dropping each girl off in-turn (and picking up the tab). The good news is that Miranda wants to be dropped off first…then Debbie…and at last Tiffany wants you to pay the cabbie and walk her up. It’s your lucky day sunshine and not the girl you started out with…it doesn’t matter because somehow I think Tiffany was fishing using Miranda as the bait. Not bad for a night’s work. For those of you who think this scenario is not plausible, I’ll posit that it happens every weekend someplace in America and beyond. It happened to me in 1986…..oh the good old days!

angelofmercy5 60F
17881 posts
4/16/2006 5:55 am

Great post!

Milfman17 56M

4/16/2006 8:40 am

Why thank you...I always share nostalgia. Funny how these things happen to people in their 20's but not in their 40's? Why can't history just repeat itself????MILFMAN

sweet_tart_2006 58F

4/23/2006 7:48 am

That made me giggle, chuckle and just plan LOL.

Thanks for the start of ?

Milfman17 56M

4/23/2006 8:32 am

Why thank you....Life is a difficult course to navigate...lots of obstacles, land mines and yes my love, ocassional drama. Our goal is to come out the other end unscathed.....

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