Update on previous post  

Luv2Lick0466 52M
41 posts
4/10/2006 9:29 am

Last Read:
5/3/2006 3:24 pm

Update on previous post


After a great deal of consideration as well as bad memories I feel it's time for me to permanently close my account here.Upon asking myself why did I join,I realized or admitted it was in connection to the breakup with my ex-girlfriend.I suppose I joined out of anger and to get back at her.

Long before the split she crudely and with malious intentions told me that all I wanted was a f?ck buddy.Over a period of time in someways resentment set in.I thought ok,I'll get an engagement ring to prove myself.One day we were talking an I had decided to go against my better judgement and present her with a ring.Just before I did,she was in a foul mood already and made the comment once again.That's all you want is a f?uck buddy,I started slowly sliding my hand out of my pants pocket,not showing one sign of emotion,but released the ring just before it came out with my hand.Already in a agitated mood from a verbal fight with her daughter she said I'm pushing you away and I have my reasons.I half heartedly grinned,if she only knew what was in my pocket maybe?Well word was never mentioned about it,not even to her mom,friends her's mine or ours no one know's till today,she will not be told,it was an will be her loss.With all that said I've decided that it's time cease showing her,all it showed was I acted before thinking.When the phrase I'm pushing you away and I have my reason's was voiced I should have calmly got up gave her a hug,kiss on the cheeck and said this is goodbye.
With all that said our relationship slowly disolved and faded into darkness until where I am today,but not to where I will be going.I returned the ring got a refund,maybe it was for the best.I wish her all the very best in her new life.

My mind is clearer now than it has been in a long time and for that I would like to thank her for helping me get my life back on a positive track and right frame of mind.I already miss the grand babies they are the one's who will miss out on me being there the most.

I have never considered myself or anyone who I've had a relationship with as a f?ck buddy.If that's what someone wants that is their business I have no right or desire to judge anyone for his or her actions other than myself.When I first joined I was like hell yeah,let's start the party.
Of course I have fantasies of this that and the other,I'm thinking I mentioned one of being with a pregnant lady.The rest of them will go unmentioned until I find the right lady and we achieve that level in a relationship.

Right now I am starting to be my old self,without anger and darkness within.It is a one day at a time process and already some people that know me personally 5 years or longer have said looks like he's coming back around to who he once was,thank you I appreciate that.

This site has got me hooked on blogging so now I will look for a place that I may continue this form of communication.I also enjoy the magazine articles as well as the advise lines,hence this post's addition to Why are we here.I will miss those whom have taken precious time to comment on my posts not to mention seeing all the beautiful,sexy profiles of you ladies.

On other blog places can others leave comments as they do here or is it just an private type journal like a one way street?I guess I'll start looking around tomorrow,maybe tonight who knows?
Ever since I decided this last night I have felt more at peace with who I am,what and which direction my life needs to go,in general an all around better mood.

If I find a place that I think I will like I will include it in a post as my "Y" thing is posted.Hope all of you have a super great day even if it's Monday.Take care out there
as always......... See Ya'

Luv2Lick0466 52M

4/13/2006 1:05 pm

Happiness must come from within one's self in order to be happy in general.I've learned a lot the past few months,with hope of tommorrow.
as always.............. See Ya'


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