My Man Bag.  

Kaliedascope61 43M
3157 posts
8/9/2006 4:51 pm

Last Read:
8/13/2006 7:01 pm

My Man Bag.

Fuck yeah!!!!!

I'm here unwinding after a long day at the office, listening to some very light hearted music, and you can't get more light hearted than Jack Black can ya?

Tonight, I have something important to say, so important in fact, that it must be written. I went out last night and bought myself a man bag, yes you heard me, man bag.

Now that you had your chuckle, and you thought of your comment about me owning a purse, let me explain a few things about my man bag.

It is black, and made of leather. I can finally haul around all my stuff that I always wanted to haul around, that is when I acquire stuff to put in it, right now it has a stick of deodorant, and a pack of cigarettes.

You see, living in the North East has changed the way I look at things. Before a ten dollar haircut and a pair of dirty jeans was acceptable, now it's just a bad haircut and a gross pair of pants.

Let me start from the beginning, something I normally do in the middle of a story, which this one is all fact, I promise!

The beginning,

CC went to the Salon last week to get hair done, I tagged along thinking I would get to see some pretty cool things, the salon is next to grand ole Yale University. So I tagged along.

After dropping her off, and parking the truck, I walked the mile back to the salon and discovered I could have parked 50 feet from it. I walked in, to say hello, and all of a sudden it hit me, KAPOW!

I have never, not once in my 31 years of existence had my hair styled. I had spent my life having it chopped, and mutilated by hair butchers, who committed serial barbicide on my head. I had often heard women talk about how great they felt after spending the day in the salon, and I couldn't help but wonder if I would feel something like that. This was a chance I had to take, and with my manhood on the line I asked CC's stylist if he could see me when he was done with her hair.

Her hair by the way was amazing, this man knew exactly what he was doing, of course he would, he was gay.

So now I have styled my hair, and every three weeks I will go back and get more work done, and finally finishing with highlights and some awesome rockstar hair, he has assured me that you will be hard pressed to see that my hair is thinning!

So let me summarize what it takes to be a man, let me rephrase, a Great Looking man in the Northeast and the rest of the planet.

1) Read a men's fashion magazine, if your clothes are not in it, then you need new ones!
2) Never, I repeat, never ever ever ever let anyone touch your except for a gay man, and when I say gay, I mean he loves men gay! He knows how to make your hair attractive.
3) Buy a man bag, I know your friends will make fun of you, but they will stop when all the women in your office are jealous and want to check out your "purse" cuz it's better then the ones they have.

Now, I have to figure out what to put in my bag, any suggestions?


Docdirk is in charge of the CT Meet and Greet, and I don't want to do it at McDonalds! Burger King maybe, but definitely not McDonalds, I heard the ball pit has razor's in it.

caressmewell 54F

8/9/2006 4:56 pm

I wanna see a pic of the man bag...I find them to be kinda cool. You can always add a small note pad and pen to jot down ideas for blogging.

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/9/2006 5:01 pm:
The pic is there, it just isn't up yet, give it a few and check back later.

docdirk 49M

8/9/2006 5:36 pm

Damn, beaten to the metrosexual line!!!

Ah well, I'm sure your vacation to Provincetown will be just fabulous, you silly little man bag, northeast, hair-by-sally-boy, freak!!!!

BTW, meet & greet... what meet & greet?!?!?!?

Ah, Its you again, Your Angel Feathers and your Blood Stains...

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/9/2006 6:21 pm:
I did take a roadtrip there a couple of weeks back.

Poor doc wasn't very fuzzy was he?

I feel bad for you now that you can't go to the stylist with me!

MWWwantmore 52F

8/9/2006 5:54 pm

Isnt it amazing how those gays know hair? It did feel great too, didnt it?

Always keep mints in your "man bag" too !

I'll have a cafe, mocha, vodka, valium latte to go please!

Good girls go to heaven.....bad girls go down!!

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/9/2006 6:21 pm:
Mints...good idea,

Mints are now in the bag.

champagnechaser 42F
1639 posts
8/9/2006 6:24 pm

Is my rabbit in your man bag I can't seem to find it

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/9/2006 6:25 pm:
No I didn't put your bunny in my man bag, I put it somewhere else, and don't look in my butt! I didn't put it there!!!

champagnechaser 42F
1639 posts
8/9/2006 6:26 pm

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/9/2006 9:21 pm:
I feel bad for you now that you can't go to the stylist with me!

He can go to the stylist with you, don't feel bad for him, he will just have to get his other head did I am sure its the stylist's specialty

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/9/2006 6:29 pm:
Whats he gonna do? braid his balls?

NSAAddict 43F

8/9/2006 7:04 pm

Love the purse!

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/10/2006 3:51 am:
It's not a purse!

caressmewell 54F

8/9/2006 8:19 pm

Awesome bag!

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/10/2006 3:51 am:
I think I'm gonna start a new trend!

mycin62 55F

8/9/2006 8:52 pm

Dude, are you turning gay? Screw the metrosexual, I think you're swinging over to the other side!!!

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/10/2006 3:51 am:
Nope, I still play for the home team.

mycin62 55F

8/9/2006 8:53 pm

Oh, yeah, don't forget chapstick in your "man bag", I never leave home without it

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/10/2006 3:52 am:
Great Idea!

Chapstick shall go into the bag.

keithcancook 61M
17930 posts
8/9/2006 9:54 pm

I know just what you mean, dude. It happened to me.

I Was A Teenage Metrosexual
I Was A Teenage Metrosexual part II
Metrosexual Mania

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/10/2006 3:52 am:
I'll come back and read that tonight after work.

keithcancook 61M
17930 posts
8/9/2006 9:59 pm

Grrr! didja see that? A #$%#$ little "emo-unctuation" screwed up my link!

Selections From the BlogLand Dictionary 2

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/10/2006 3:53 am:
damn smilies everywhere!

alphuctup 41M

8/10/2006 1:26 am

I thought Barbicide was what Ken did when he came home to find his woman in bed with Action Man.

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/10/2006 3:53 am:
Only if Ken cuts hair.

ArtisticTwist75 42F
2505 posts
8/10/2006 3:08 am

If you lived in AZ I would say sunscreen was an absolute must for the man bag... since you don't, my vote would be hand sanitizer... They make these tiny little bottles of it... they fit in my purse super nice so one should go in your man bag with room to spare Kalie.


Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/10/2006 3:54 am:
Sunscreen is a good idea redardless, and hand sanitizer is now going in the bag, maybe a little bottle of lube too?

ButteryDelight 59F

8/10/2006 12:12 pm

How about some gum? I like to chew it when flying as it keeps my ears from popping.

Buttery Delight

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/13/2006 5:28 am:
Yup, got some Hubba Bubba in the bag

pragmaticCTcpl 62M/51F

8/10/2006 12:53 pm

Keep in mind that this is coming from a Mom.....aspirin...tissues...and a pen.

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/13/2006 5:29 am:
CC put those things in there already, I did think of the pen, but not the tissues.

HBowt2 60F

8/10/2006 1:58 pm

you mean you didn't get your hair done for atlanta......

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/13/2006 5:29 am:
Well, going to atlanta might have had something to do with it.

LustyTaurus 49M
21253 posts
8/10/2006 6:31 pm

Lets hope you never need a Manzere to go with your Manstyle and Manpurse...

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/13/2006 5:30 am:
A manzere? I don't even want to know, is that what you wear to cover your mangina?

lissi888888 53F
1401 posts
8/10/2006 7:10 pm

The lube is a great idea...have some in my backpack (purse...whatever). It's handy...always Oh...and a penlight is always helpful

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/13/2006 5:30 am:
A penlight? what would you use it for?

frassy_sass 55F

8/10/2006 7:44 pm

Always remember and never forget:
A well prepared metro never leaves home without his Astroglide.

Oh, and the general rule is make sure your shoes match your purse. No white after Labor Day.


Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/13/2006 5:32 am:
black shoes, black manbag

You people and your purse comments!

TzarsAmuseChant 42M
2854 posts
8/10/2006 7:48 pm

um... I carry a blow up sex doll in my man bag. I don't use it. I jsut carry it so when some one accuses me of being gay, I can whip out my doll and say "Does it look like I am gay now??"

The doll also acts as a GREAT decoy when you've been arrested for lewd conduct and find yourself in a cell with Bubba Fatdick.

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/13/2006 5:32 am:
Jenna Jameson has a blow up doll doesn't she? maybe I can get that one.

jadedbabe78 107F

8/11/2006 5:25 pm

Nothing wrong with a little metro in your life.

Nice purse err I mean man bag .

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/13/2006 5:32 am:
You know you want one just like it!

rm_agathon12 47M
1311 posts
8/12/2006 11:50 pm

It's his "European carryall."

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/13/2006 5:33 am:
You damn straight it is!

2375 posts
8/13/2006 2:04 pm

Come back to Texas! Ain't that a great song? The purse is cool, you even have room for your "Bro" (the Seinfeld Man Bra). Just kiddin', it takes a lot of confidence in your own masculinity to be able to carry a "bag". Just make sure it's Louis Vuitton or Prada. I'm a purse whore!

Kaliedascope61 replies on 8/13/2006 7:03 pm:
Those are girly purse's,

I have a Kenneth Cole MAN BAG!!!!

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