Six Whacked Facts About My Gonads  

5219 posts
4/11/2006 10:47 am

Last Read:
11/2/2007 8:42 pm

Six Whacked Facts About My Gonads

This coming in real late for being tagged by


1. due to my decent sized portion of native american genetics my balls are nearly naturally hairless. And I won't let a razor anywhere near them.

2. the size of my unaroused organ of happyness has continually increased as I've gotten older. The aroused versions size has remained constant. This now results in me having little worry about being seen naked on cold days. But if it's really cold enough (like approaching freezing) the old dimensions once greatly feared can still indeed return.

3. The length of the distance between the base of my palm to the tip of my middle fingr is 7.5 inches. And in my case the measuring of that alternate area of the body as a guage for determining the aroused length of another quite specific male area of the body is dead-on accurate.

4. My organ of happiness has indeed ventured into my own rectum. But I certainly cannot say that it was able to do anything that might be callled a "completed mission" there. It was simply able visit for short time but soon left as it did not feel very "at home" there.

5. The worst I ever smashed my nuts was when I was climbing over a brick wall in the 4th grade. I put the full force of my own body weight down on them and it took about 1/2 hour until I could walk again and still 15 more than that for the residual pain to finally clear. From what I hear menstrual cramp pain is nearly identical to smashed nuts pain only it's lower in intensity but much longer in duration. I don't envy your gilrs out there with that.

6. I used to obsessively clean my scrotum. And I had and still have the cleanest scrotum in the universe!

And I'm absolutely breaking the chain and ain't taggin' nobody back!

PS. One of these items contains some blatant exaggeration. (and it ain't #3)


papyrina 52F
21133 posts
4/11/2006 12:00 pm

well all that was nice to know

I'm a

i'm here to stay


4/11/2006 12:31 pm

Hi Papyrina,

Intuitively I knew that these facts would be of great value to many.

But of course my highest hopes are that whisper will gain the most benefit.

Hey Papy have you ever heard of Ouzo? And if so do you have any tips on survivng a hnagover from it?


mysteriesofme 45F

4/11/2006 1:16 pm

I out did Number Five.. except of course, (I don't have balls.. you've seen pictures.. lol)

ah.. it was in a blonde moment.. and a really funny story.. my bestfriend loves telling.. (male bestfriend) - we were on my dad's land trying to recreate the old trails.. cutting trees that fell.. there were a lot of trees.. and we made a lot of money selling the wood.. but, anyhow - he was using the chain saw.. standing under the tree (two of us couldn't fit our arms around).. my eyes were fully on him thinking he was a dumbass.. worrying.. half paying attention to what I was doing.. there was a tree maybe a foot wide.. nice size tree.. but.. I could move it.. it was propped against two other trees.. which held it in place. It just rotted off at the bottom and leaned against the others.. So I'm watching him.. and worrying- for him and that I'm going to rethrow out my back (I slid the two lower discs out of place a LONG TIME AG So I positioned my feet good.. shoulder with a part.. looking at him again.. I pulled it up moved it over and let it go...


it kinda slid back.. as it rolled down and became a 'cat'apult.. right between my legs... I went air born.. came back down ON THE TREE... and grabbed on... oh a five feet above ground.. and just laid there, arms (tightly) and legs (loosely) around the tree- with tears streaming out of my eyes.. laughing at myself... as blood ran down my legs... I looked at my oldest daughter who saw the whole thing.. and said "oops" and continued to laugh saying "OUCH" not screaming.. not crying.. just a simple "ouch".. she heard the blood drop on some leaves and took off like a deer screaming for my bestfriend... I just closed one eye and thought.. "Oh great.." he came running.. (FYI - He is a nurse) and after fighting with me awhile.. got me to take off my pants... I was severely bruised.. knees up... the blood was from deep scratches, ripped by a knot... my hands were pretty messed up to.. for when the tree was coming up.. my hands went straight between my legs protecting the impact....on the way up.... being in the air was funny... the fall down was the "oh shit" part.. I'm surprised there was no hospital trip... for three weeks I felt like I had the best sex of my life the night before.. No man has outdone that tree yet.. lol

rm_cockmerollme 46F
1223 posts
4/11/2006 11:29 pm

Who cares?

They are all so entertaining..

But, and you will forgive me..., you look the type to shave your balls.....

maybe just once? high school?



4/12/2006 1:09 am

hey cockme,

If I didn't know better I'd nearly say that you might almost be a regular reader now.

I first tried out the ol' testicular defoliation by means of a standard face shaving razor in my later 20's whilst enrolled in Cinematically oriented grad school. It began an an experiment in finding out if merely trimming a bit of pubic fluff with scissors might help to ease the common and oftetimes quite annoying phenomenon sometimes referred to as "itchy huevos".

At some too-late point in which it was seen that far more had been trimmed than was ever forseen or intended it was conceded that it would now be best to simply just shave the works in order to quit idiotically nitpicking with it.

And that was that. Shorn as it were. It actually felt like a great "freeing up" of sorts and it really did feel better.....

for about a day.

But when it began to whisker up and grow back WATCH OUT!!!!!!!

It was no different than walking around with a bunch of cactus stuffed down my pants. No exaggeration on that either. It really did feel like that. So after that I swore the whole practice off.

Now though you'd never know that I did not shave only there are no signs of any "ingrown" difficulties that shavers often have.

Keeping balls truly clean is a huge challenge due to the frequent presence of a superglue like substance and the little fishies that it carries which are so damned adept at very quickly swimming down any little hole they can find . And keeping the "dick diamonds" at bay which form from this material, similarly to how pearls do deep down inside of the scrotal pores, requires that one be ever hygienically vigilant.

And in my particular case the keeping this simple vigilance is enough in itself to pleasingly defoliate my dangling regions. No razor needed. But if I ever slack with the hygeinic vigilance (which I don't anymore) the scrotal region will soon get scruffy and scrappy lookin' along with that lumpy "freshly plucked chicken" look on the surface. The lumps are the crystalline "dick diamonds" forming like pearls beneath and they are also 80% (or more) of the cause of "itchy heuvos". The sharp crystals which form can become like vituial needles in there. Also the lack of hygiene which causes that is also the general culprit behind what you mention in this old classic of yours...If we are fish, what do THEY smell like down there

I still have yet to perform an experiment with burnt Scotch tape in regards to that.

Too much information? NAH!!!


Whispersoftly5 53F
15176 posts
4/18/2006 9:02 pm

LMAO! This is great and I just love a nice clean scrotum!!! Thank you for playing!!!

Whisper... {=}


7/21/2007 2:14 am

    Quoting Whispersoftly5:
    LMAO! This is great and I just love a nice clean scrotum!!! Thank you for playing!!!

    Whisper... {=}
Yet again, I'll be going to hell for sure for being so late on my response to this . But better late than never!

And maybe some day you'll actually get to check out my scrotum for yourself!


Whispersoftly5 53F
15176 posts
7/21/2007 3:08 pm

LMAO! I'd love to check out your scrotum for myself!!! And I've some fun parts for you to check out too!!! {=} {=} {=}

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