I felt helpless today............  

6876 posts
3/22/2006 2:13 am

Last Read:
3/23/2006 5:24 am

I felt helpless today............

This evening at work, we had a lady come in our facility crying.

She came looking for help. It seems her ex husband had come to her house this evening and threatened to kill her!

She went to the facility next door, which is like a friendship house for the homeless. Well they have not opened thier doors yet and could be no help to her.

We called all the hot lines and they all said to call the police. But she said she could not call them, cause her ex that was threatening her, is a cop!

She had no car, and no money. She only had a small bag of some of her belongings. I helped her call the local churches and believe it or not, none of them wanted to get involved! Can you fucking believe it? Whats this world coming to.

I didn't have the money to give her for the motel near by, but i suggested to the nurse to let her stay in one of our empty rooms til tomorrow when everything was open and she could find help!

I felt so sorry for her. Coming from an abussive marriage myself, I could feel her pain.

I would have drove her to one of the abuse centers myself, but I know my piece of shit would not have made it to the city.

I just can't understand why thier is not more help for women with these problems, since it is becoming more and more!

I will find out tomorrow if she stayed in our facility, and I hope she did!


ToolsMulesFaker 41M
163 posts
3/22/2006 2:53 am

Take a wife beater and tie him to the bed, carefully rest his meat and 2 veg on a hard flat item-lets say a house brick.

take a 2nd brick and knock both together while singing a song..

Its so sad that this day in age there are people who beat their partners ( wives included )

HnB needs a suit of armor made for her ))

HOTNBOTHERED0414 replies on 3/22/2006 5:50 am:
And abusive spouses is more and more these days!

happyladychat 49F
3740 posts
3/22/2006 3:23 am

Yes, I know that feeling.... I met an old lady with a very young child, about 3 yr old, and she was waiting anxiously for someone to deliver their tickets [at the airport]. Her mobile was locked and she did not know how to activate it. When I tried to help by calling the number she claimed the delivery person for her tickets, the lady on the other end of the phone told me it was wrong number.

I had no choice but to refer her to the local authority, since I myself is foriegner to Shanghai.

Till now, I still wonder if she had got her tickets and flew to the destination with her small kid.


Make it your challenge.... turn me ON!!

HOTNBOTHERED0414 replies on 3/22/2006 5:49 am:
That sucks when kids are involved!

angelofmercy5 60F
17881 posts
3/22/2006 4:49 am

Awwwww sweetie! This was a hard one, wasn't it? To want to help and not know how to is so frustrating. You would think that there would be more help for cases like this. In my area there are several shelters....but for some of them you have to get the police involved...because they keep their locations secret. This wouldn't have helped this lady whose husband was a cop. I hope everything turned out alright for this woman.

HOTNBOTHERED0414 replies on 3/22/2006 5:49 am:
I'll keep ya posted!

(What the fuck is this shit..?? *rolls eyes*)

3/22/2006 5:08 am

Helpless to help the suffering of another truly does SUCK. You did what you could and many people would NOT have done that much. Having found a Sister like you in Her time of need did HELP even if it wasn't all you wish you could have given Her, You were there....Ready


HOTNBOTHERED0414 replies on 3/22/2006 9:29 pm:
Wish I could have done more

firestarter665 43M/40F

3/22/2006 5:50 am

You would think that with all the abuse hotlines out there that someone would have been able to give her some info on what to do. As far as the churches not wanting to help, that's just wrong. I know for a fact that the church that I attend would help if I were ever in a situation like that. This world is becoming more selfish by the day.

I hope all worked out for this woman. Keep us posted.

HOTNBOTHERED0414 replies on 3/22/2006 9:30 pm:
The nurses called my big boss to see what could be done, He (the fucker) my boss, called the police, and they picked her up and took her to the mental hospital in the next town! That was bullshit!

BBbikerbabe6969 52F
37 posts
3/22/2006 6:00 am

That just sucks! I feel for her.

mycin62 55F

3/22/2006 7:09 am

That was a tough situation. It's to bad she was so afraid to call the police. I hope your supervisor let her stay there. In my area we have an info line that you can call for area shelters. It really sucks that people now days don't want to get involved, I see it all the time in the ER. Good thing you were there to help a sister out!!!

HOTNBOTHERED0414 replies on 3/22/2006 9:31 pm:
He didn't let her stay! My big boss man is an asshole!

TTigerAtty 63M

3/22/2006 7:09 am

HNB ...

This is a sad story in many respects. First: The abuse of a partner is obviously so wrong. My Lord, in today's society, it is so easy to get a divorce. The dickhead should just petition for a divorce if it has come to that rather than beat this poor lady. Second: The fact that her husband is a law enforcement officer is really distrubing. He should know better just from his own personal experience in dealing with domestic violence. He should be held to an even higher standard. Did they miss something when doing a psychological profile of this guy before hiring him? Someone carrying a gun should be more even tempered than this deadbeat! Third: The unwillingness of agencies and churches to provide some initial help to this lady is REALLY, REALLY SAD! That is what they are supposedly there for! To help people!

You know, this story should be written as a Letter to the Editor of your local newspaper. And I think you should name the agencies and the churches that refused to provide even some initial assistance to this poor lady! They deserve to have their hypocrisy and gross indifference exposed!

HOTNBOTHERED0414 replies on 3/22/2006 9:31 pm:
I am really thinking about that letter! TY for the idea!

MrNuttz05 50M

3/22/2006 1:59 pm

You are a 'saint'... Love your heart & I hope she will be safe...

HOTNBOTHERED0414 replies on 3/22/2006 9:33 pm:
She had a place to sleep, but I do not think she needed a mental hospital. but she had a place to rest her head!

rm_cru1972 46M
4407 posts
3/22/2006 4:02 pm

I agree with tiger 'bout the letter.

As far as the cop is concerned, I know alot of them here. Spent lots of time with them. Talked to Chief of Police for my town, He said;"Talk to State Troopers in a different district, if sumthing like this happens again. For instance if you are up north call a southern district. They will deal with the problem, LIKE it should.
Hope this is helpful in the future.

HOTNBOTHERED0414 replies on 3/22/2006 9:34 pm:
I tried to get her to call the sheriff and not the local cops, but she feared everyone in a uniform.

LustyTaurus 49M
21253 posts
3/22/2006 4:34 pm

What you describe is a real problem...there is a wife beater in every profession. Hopefully when this all shakes out the old boys club will do the right thing for this lady and not the cop with a problem.


HOTNBOTHERED0414 replies on 3/22/2006 9:34 pm:
I was married to a wife beater for 10 years, he was in the military, and in the end they backed him and not me!

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