The Dirty Talker  

rm_Ericashope 31F
0 posts
2/1/2006 9:49 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

The Dirty Talker

*Sitting in the dark, on a bed, drumming finger tips on table top ,thats next to the bed, Shifts the phone to the other ear, on the other end, theres soft moans coming from a guy*

"Mmmm...your moans are making me so horny....."

*On phone* "Your voice is getting my rocks off....tell me your name.."


*guy* Your's so deep and raspy...i love it.....can we meet"?

Michelle: Oh on a minute..*puts phone down and and lights up a ciggarette , inhales, then starts to gag*

*guy has a weird look on his face*

Michelle: Ok, sugar, i live at 3252 TransV road.....i'll be waiting...." *evil grin* When you arrive, i have something i want you to do for me.."

*GUY*: "Oh, ANYTHING!!!" *10 minutes pass and the guy gets there and knocks on the door. No answer. Knocks louder.No answer. Creaks open the door*


The guy looks around, the whole room is dark.

*Michelle drums finger tips on table top* "I've been waiting for you.........."

*Guy sniffs* "Where are you?? I have bad night vision...and what's that smell?....smells like someone busted ass."

*Michelle starts laughing, a low maniacal laugh*

*guy feels his way over to the bed , and Michelle reaches out and grabs him*

*Guy starts feeling her up.*

guy: What big hands you have.........

Michelle: The more to feel you with, my dear.

*Guy feels around more* Guy: What a big nose you have.."

Michelle: The better to smell your ass with, my dear.

Guy*gulps, and feels her gigantic belly* : What..a big belly you have.....

Michelle *cant think of anything to say* Um.......I like to eat alot....

Guy: well...more cushion for the pushin!! *begins un-doing his pants*

Michelle: Feel me some more, it's getting me so ha- i mean horny!

Guy: Oh..ok!!! *gleams with excitement* i've never done it in the dark before!!! *starts feeling her thighs, then gets to her most private area*

guygasp* : what a big....lump you have!!!!!

Michelle *Starts cackling* Well..*claps on light (you know, those clap on, clap off lights that old people buy*

"The better to screw you with!!!!"

*Michelle is revealed to be a 500 pound 60 year old man,(dont ask) wearing a mullet wig, and wearing light blue eye-shadow and sloppy apllied red lipstick, and wearing a sun dress....

*Guy screams*

Michelle: I'll make you a deal *lights up a cig*, I will gum you, if you nibble on these damn corns i got on my feet..."

*reaches for teeth on table-top*

Please........Michelle!!!! Or whatever your name is!!

Michelle: well you can just call me Mitchell, but keep screaming my name, it's making me happy!

*guy tries to get off the bed and run but Mitchell grabs him and forces his face to his feet.*


Mitchell: Theyre just corns..the only way to get rid of them is to bite them off......." *cackle*

Guy: Ewwwww!!!!! Here ,take this *farts in his face hoping it will smell so bad that He'll pass out*

Mitchell *smile* Oh, i love a man who farts!!!! We are going to get along just great!!!!!

*guy sucks in his breath, trying to put his own self out of his misery, but it doesnt work*

This is one of my half-hearted stories..i know its sick....but it's MY blog......

till next time

*O-B-C-T Out*

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