One Week Later/A Little More Advice?  

2208 posts
3/30/2005 5:59 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

One Week Later/A Little More Advice?

Life has a habit of getting in the way of blogging sometimes, doesn't it? LOL

I've been really busy over the past week and have finally been able to sit down and read over my emails properly.

Thanks again to everyone that responded to my previous post. The comments helped a lot of people and judging from some of the emails I've received, I think our little forum gave a lot of hope to both men and women. Yay for all of us!

As Rockwriter58 said (before I could) a couple of the men were perfect examples of guys I (and I'm sure some of the ladies) wouldn't respond to. Anyone that has followed my blog so far should be able to pick them out pretty easily. Gentlemen, don't use those templates under any circumstances. Please. I beg of you.

I've been asked privately "exactly" what sort of man I'm looking for. Other than the physical attributes that I listed on my profile, my only answer is (to quote the old Edie Brickell song)"I know what I know if you know what I mean". LOL
I can't express what the intangible "it" is that attracts me to one person and not another.

Think of how many brands of jeans there are out there. You might be able to find dozens upon dozens in your size, but you just know it when you've got the right fit.

Having said that, I should comment on the friendly little dig I got from one of the responders about my not contacting him after he emailed me. He did get a response. Just not the one he was looking for. LOL

I know how much it sucks not to receive a response, so I use the autoreply feature. It thanks senders for their interest, details a specific time period during which he (or in some cases they) can expect a response (IF I'm interested) and wishes them luck in finding someone more compatible with them (if I'm not). I think that's fair.

Here's the part of the blog where I'm soliciting advice. If you can think of a better way of handling this, please let me know how I should improve this "system", for lack of a better term.

I get a decent number of emails (despite the blog!) and found in the recent past that when I responded personally, I ended up starting dialogues I really didn't want to be having. LOL

I think that's enough rambling for the day.

Sending good vibes to you wherever you are...

zenyen 67M

3/30/2005 8:56 pm

I don't see anything wrong with handling it that way, DC. I rarely get any response and it would be nice to know they actually got the email and considered it, instead of wondering if it got lost in the dark depths of AdultFriendFinder.

sportyfun56 107M

3/31/2005 10:20 am

DC babe,
thanks for the good vibes..
you're not doing too badly with the way you are handling your responses. It certainly is nice to receive ANY response to an email. At least a "thanks but not interested" and even a short explanation why. It helps to know if she found something about your profile, email, picture, handle, etc, that was a turnoff for her. It may be something you can correct, or, it may just be that you weren't a good match.

But I think all men have resigned themselves to the fact that 95% or more of any contact efforts will go off never to return.

enjoying your blogs,


3/31/2005 5:42 pm

Sportyfun56's comment is pretty close to the mark, I believe 98% or more of attempts to contact get no return. I think your approach is good and it lets the sender know where they stand, I wouldn't change it. In fact, I wish more women would do the same as you. The simple fact of the matter is numbers are not on the mans side on AdultFriendFinder or online period. If you don't have some incredible catch phrase or are smooth as can be then most women simply do not notice you. Thanks for the blog, it is good reading!

IPman 62M
313 posts
3/31/2005 6:00 pm

Oh OH dem good vibrations....

Hi DCE I have missed seeing you and your blogs!

Hope all is well.

1586 posts
4/2/2005 7:34 pm

Sounds like I'm doing okay with the autoreply, so I'll keep it. : )

What I've also started doing is using the Quick Reply feature so that the guy (or couple) is given an answer right away.

Awww...Thanks for missing me, IPman. If I decide to go missing for an extended period of time again, I'll let you know where I went. LOL

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