Lameass Women's Profiles  

Corrupt_Me_79 38M
40 posts
7/3/2006 9:49 pm

Last Read:
8/24/2007 6:37 am

Lameass Women's Profiles

How good do women have it on this site?

The ratio of men to women is already 100:1 when you sign up. Weed out the fake profiles ( SexInChandler, I'm looking at you), and the ratio probably jumps closer to 500:1. Talk about a target-rich environment. All you have to do is get past the stigma of searching for a sexual relationship on a website and then you've got your pick of 500 people on your first day? Why do any work? Let them come to you!

But it doesn't stop there. You don't even have to fill out your profile. There appears to be some cookie-cutter format you can use. Check out these real examples:

"I'm the type who's willing to go fast with the body, slow with the soul. Hey there! I'm a post-feminist slut. Spare me the philosophy and fuck me silly, already! When I'm out driving I like to see the sights along the backroads. Experience-wise, I've spent years learning how to be completely thorough with my lovers. Sexually, I'm pretty open to a "friends with benefits" situation. For me a perfect Friday night is one that doesn't end until the next day. For me a perfect date is anything as long as it ends back at my place with our clothes off. I get along best with people who can talk about something besides sex or sports. I'm not changing my life, I'm just trying to make it more interesting. I look forward to putting the recent past behind me. If you contact me bear in mind that I'm just looking for a fuck buddy, not a soulmate. At least not right away!"

Tempting, yes? Let's continue:

"I'm the type who's always looking to improve on what I have. I'm your typical free spirit, single and unfettered and roaming the Earth at will. Hey there! I'm a hard working woman, enjoying what I have but looking for more. When I go out, I go with the flow, and end up where I end up. I get along best with people who can see my value and aren't afraid to let me know it. The philosophy I live by is don't judge, but always stay true to my personal set of values. If you contact me please include a face pic."

Hmmm. What else is there?

"Hey there! I'm your typical bored housewife. I'm your typical down-to-earth woman, always treating people with respect and honesty. I'm interested in taking a few night classes with an experienced lover. When I'm at home alone, I'm calling up friends who want to cure their boredom with me. The philosophy I live by is stay relaxed, stay mellow, stay loose and be open to whatever happens. On Sunday afternoons I like to take things easy, getting ready for the work week ahead. I prefer to just share beautiful moments with a special someone. Commitment-wise, we can just be good friends who want to have a little fun together. I want to find a friend who's also friendly on a physical level. I look forward to hearing from you soon. If you contact me please be discreet. I'll do the same for you. I'm not changing my life, because things are great the way they are."

So, women, here is how to write a killer profile.

A ) I'm the type who's (comment about sex life/comment about your personality)
B ) I'm you're typical (slutty/non-slutty)
C ) I'm not changing my life, I'm (banal inanity/silly inanity)
D ) If you contact me, (remember what I just said/be sure you can meet my requirements)

Now, post it and let the cock pictures and one sentence emails start rolling in!

Or -- and this is just a thought -- you could fill out your profile yourself so people who contact you can get a taste of your actual personality. It won't eliminate the crude propositions, but I bet it will cut down on the Weeding process and perhaps attract the kind of men you are looking for. Fish with the right bait, as it were.

Just a thought.

Corrupt_Me_79 38M

7/4/2006 9:20 am

Those are hilarious. Thanks for the link!

cuteNEway 42F

7/5/2006 8:43 pm

LOVED your flipside cookie cutter hun. I think you have described every chick-flick watching, high maintenance bitch out there! I hate those women...

tee hee

amakamaria 37F
4299 posts
10/9/2006 1:32 am

Call me jaded... but i don't think it matters how you fill out the profile... you still get the same crap... the number of emails i get saying we are both looking for the same thing absolutely cracks me up... If they read my profile at all, they would know that they sound like a total fool... I think men see boobs/pussy and they forget how to read... But honestly its amusing... so I'm not really complaining... they are just wasting their time!


"We believe what we experience, but we often forget that we experience what we believe."

cumguzzler956 51F

8/24/2007 5:45 am

Loved your blog on ladies profiles. I know that you viewed mine and I also noticed that you didn't even stop for a sec and say Hi. I consider my profile to be a little different because I took a different approach and tried HONESTY. And guess what? It works! This is the second time for me on AdultFriendFinder and I'm getting just as much traffic as I did last time, and my profile is almost the same as last time. Funnier yet is that I do not have a picture on my profile for obvious reasons, because I'm married. I still get lots of mail daily and not all of it from Tucson, where I live, a good part of it is from up in the Mesa and PHX area. I have made a lot of friends on AdultFriendFinder because not everyone is your type, and I've also had quite a few really hot times with guys that I see from time to time, and yes, some of them have been from the PHX area. Because of some wonderful ladies on here that just want to collect pictures and play cock teases for a while and then disappear, I want to thank you. I get to have my pick of the litter and some of them have been Hot, Hotter and OMG do that again!

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