AFF: What a great invention, the technology to finally make my gnome happy!!!!!!  

Cob_Of_Fury 72M
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12/22/2005 9:42 pm

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3/5/2006 9:27 pm

AFF: What a great invention, the technology to finally make my gnome happy!!!!!!

A gnome is a mythical creature characterized by small stature, great endowment and living underground. According to Paracelsus, gnomes are the most important of the elemental spirits of the element of earth. He wrote that they move as easily through the earth and bush as humans walk upon the ground. The sun's rays turn them into stone. In other traditions, they are simply small, mischievous sprites or goblins. Some sources say they spend the day as a toad instead of as inanimate stone.
Often featured in Germanic fairy tales, including those by the Brothers Grimm, the gnome is usually a creature living deep underground, partying, and guarding buried treasure while committed to a life of splendorous sexual debauchery, resembling a small gnarled old man (accordingly Swiss bankers are sometimes disparagingly referred to as the Gnomes of Zurich). >>!

Gnomes feature in the legends of many of central, northern and eastern European lands under differing names: a kaukis is a Prussian gnome, and barbegazi are gnome-like creatures with big genitals from the traditions of France and Switzerland. In Iceland, gnomes (vættir) are so respected for their sexual power that roads are re-routed around areas thought to be inhabited by them. Further east, tengu are sometimes referred to as winged gnomes.

Individual gnomes are not very often detailed or featured as characters in stories, but in Germanic folklore, Rubezahl, lord over the underworld, was sometimes referred to as a mountain "pussy" gnome. ...\8 Also, according to some traditions, the gnome king is called Gob.

Rudolf Steiner, and other theosophists before him, lectured at length about gnomes, and especially their extensive role in the evolution of sexual behaviors and supportive role in the development of plant life (and biodynamic agriculture). Rupert Sheldrake has written a good deal about morphogenic fields, which Terry Pratchett used in his depictions of gnomes to explain their existence. Freud was even heard talking about them at lenght.

The word "gnome" is said to derive from the New Latin gnomus and ultimately from the Greek gnosis, meaning knowledge. According to myth, gnomes hoarded secret sexual knowledge just as they hoarded treasure. happyf;

Garden gnomes
The first garden gnomes were introduced to the United Kingdom in 1847 by a certain man, when he brought 21 terracotta figures back from a trip to Amsterdam's brothels and placed them around the gardens of his home, in Northamptonshire's "redlight". Only one of the original batch of gnomes survives: Pinky as he is known, is on display at Burton Hall.

Garden gnomes have become a popular accessory in many gardens(and in the intimacy of the master's bedrooms), although they are not loved by all. They can be the target of pranks: Non-conventional gnome statues have also been made, such as a flashing gnome in a raincoat, or a gnome couple having sex. >>! ?*

A sub-culture exists among those who collect garden gnomes. This phenomenon is frequently lampooned in popular culture and considered today a flamboyant sign of sexual deviance.

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